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Wake Celebrity Slap-Match: Phonz vs Chas

Who wins the Wake Celebrity Slap-Match: Chas or Phonz?

  • Chas

    Votes: 3 10.0%
  • Phonz

    Votes: 27 90.0%
  • It's a tie

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • Other (explain in thread)

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    30

IrishSlim

The Sultan of Swashbuckle
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In this recurring thread, we take two completely random Wake athletes and ask the ever-important question: who would win in a slap-match? Because living in the theoretical allows us these types of freedoms!

The setting: Outside the Miller Center

millerlg.jpg


In corner numero uno, standing 7 feet tall and weighing in at 245 pounds dripping wet, we have the Lug from Lovington, CHAS .... MCFARRRRRRRRLAAAAAND

79970895.jpg


In corner deux, at 5'9 and a robust 190 pounds, we have the Pahokee Picker himself, ALPHHHHHHHHONSOLOLOLOLOLOLO SMITH

alphonso-smith.jpg


Foreign objects ... are allowed!

What say ye?
 
Phonz as Chas would sneak in a punch, which would turn Alphonso into the Phonz (kinda like Bruce Banner into the Incredible Hulk)
 
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Might be closer than one would think. Chas always had a bit of a nasty WWE heel edge to him, and allowing foreign objects is key here. Ultimately, I think Phonz would win, but Chas would give it a good effort.
 
Chas has more fight in him than you'd think for a goofy white guy, but The Phonz is just too hot to handle.
 
Can I throw out another hypothetical?

If Chas took a naked picture of himself and sent it to his gf, what position would he go with? Do you think he would go for the tuck?
 
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I feel like Chas would extend his 12 foot arm and hold phonz away while phonz swung punches without ever coming close to reaching chas.

Cartoon style
 
Umm.... this really happened. Phonz won, but Chas won the rematch, FWIW

All over a woman of course
 
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