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The Pit Parenting Thread

DeaconCav06 said:
Not looking forward to these issues. My biggest problem right now is that our son bit the hell out of the kid in our neighborhood that he is doing “daycare” with when he was over at their house this morning. Now my wife is buying all of these “teeth aren’t for biting” books and it’s not helping that I’m pointing out teeth are precisely for biting.
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"Chew food, not friends!"

Does he ever try to bite you guys? I know that sounds like a weird question, but baby was exploring her new teeth/abilities and chomped my nipple a few times. I would (clearly) say "ouch!!! Don't bite me!" and make a very exaggerated sad face/shake my head no. I forget where I saw it, but something about babies already being wired to look for reactions to things in others' expressions/emotions. It also helps differentiate between a normal 'no' (which they can hear a lot) and a 'don't do this because it hurts someone else.'

...at least that's working now. It'll be a different conversation if (or when) she bites someone because she's mad at them.
 
I do not look forward to my daughters becoming teenagers. Especially since I was such a piece of shit as a teenager.

That being said, your kid’s reaction is pretty telling and admirable. Weed and booze are pretty damn prevalent in our area and especially once driving becomes an option. Instructing him on the dangers of substances is important, but it may be even more important for him to be cognizant of who is using social media or recording the shit going on. That stuff stays around forever , and it can really have lingering detrimental effects.
 
TownieDeac said:
5 week old has decided he no longer needs sleep and would prefer to keep his eyes open all day
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We're going through the other side of that right now, but for months 2 and 3 our son would only sleep for 2-2.5 hours consecutively max, unless we got really likely. Which was a killer for mom who was constantly feeding him and maybe getting one hour of sleep here and there due to his condensed sleep cycle.

3 month old boy is finally sleep 4-5 hours at the beginning of the night now, usually starting around 7-7:30 once we give him a bath. I then man the baby monitor while mom sleeps and hand off the monitor to mom once he wakes up again around 11:30-12, at which point I change him and then go to bed. Next step is hopefully him pushing that to 5 or 6 hours.

Also the boy's personality is buzzing these days. He's gets so damn smiley and happy at the most random things and loves making faces with his dad. We're in a good place right now.
 
CH to echo what most everyone else said, your boy is a good one.

Being around drugs and marijuana is a common experience for a majority of HS students. If you have a 15-16 year old or older who's going to parties I'd just assume that alcohol and weed are probably available. Teaching your child how to adapt to those situations is key. Whether it is being the DD, partaking safely in moderation, or removing himself from the situation. As another poster pointed out it only gets more challenging in college, so developing that social maturity now is important. I know a few high achieving "smart" kids who burned out when they got college, and they all had sheltered backgrounds and didn't know how to handle the freedom and "opportunities" of college life.

Also as someone who's taught on both sides of the tracks, the harder drugs are way more prevalent in more affluent communities, simply because the rich kids have the cash. I currently teach at a low income school and I know that my kids party on the weekends, and from what I can tell its cheap weed and booze. Which was my experience: the alcohol part at least - I've never really enjoy marijuana but had many HS and college friends that did. And none of them use marijuana regularly anymore.
 
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mako1331 said:
I do not look forward to my daughters becoming teenagers. Especially since I was such a piece of shit as a teenager.

That being said, your kid’s reaction is pretty telling and admirable. Weed and booze are pretty damn prevalent in our area and especially once driving becomes an option. Instructing him on the dangers of substances is important, but it may be even more important for him to be cognizant of who is using social media or recording the shit going on. That stuff stays around forever , and it can really have lingering detrimental effects.
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Yeah, honestly, I feel like I would buy my kid a new car for exhibiting such mature behavior. Blowing a 0.0 and being a responsible DD to get his friends home is a rarity these days. Y'all have done a great job as parents it sounds like.
 
lbE08 said:
"Chew food, not friends!"

Does he ever try to bite you guys? I know that sounds like a weird question, but baby was exploring her new teeth/abilities and chomped my nipple a few times. I would (clearly) say "ouch!!! Don't bite me!" and make a very exaggerated sad face/shake my head no. I forget where I saw it, but something about babies already being wired to look for reactions to things in others' expressions/emotions. It also helps differentiate between a normal 'no' (which they can hear a lot) and a 'don't do this because it hurts someone else.'

...at least that's working now. It'll be a different conversation if (or when) she bites someone because she's mad at them.
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He’s tried biting my wife once.
 
lbE08 said:
"Chew food, not friends!"

Does he ever try to bite you guys? I know that sounds like a weird question, but baby was exploring her new teeth/abilities and chomped my nipple a few times. I would (clearly) say "ouch!!! Don't bite me!" and make a very exaggerated sad face/shake my head no. I forget where I saw it, but something about babies already being wired to look for reactions to things in others' expressions/emotions. It also helps differentiate between a normal 'no' (which they can hear a lot) and a 'don't do this because it hurts someone else.'

...at least that's working now. It'll be a different conversation if (or when) she bites someone because she's mad at them.
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He’s tried biting my wife once.
 
Anybody ever accidentally popped your kid’s back when you pick them up? I lifted up the 2yo today and it sounded like someone stepping on bubble wrap.
 
General overview of stages of parenthood -

Birth to walking - constant exhaustion. To answer almost every question you may ask - yes, that's perfectly normal and it will be fine.

Walking to age 4 - they are always one step away from death; constant suicide watch. Again, yes that's perfectly normal and it will be fine. No, your child is not a savant. They are a toddler. Easier than birth to walking and more fun.

4 to 11ish - sweet spot; enjoy every minute of it even if it feels exhausting. Again, yes that's perfectly normal and it will be fine. No, your child will not be going to the Olympics or Juliard.

11ish to 14 - You are a taxi driver who get's slightly dumber each year. Still fun.

14 to 18 - Hanging with other parents. You get some of your life back. Remember, nothing good happens after curfew. At least pretend you are aligned with their friend's parents or vice versa. Also, you have as much control as the most lenient parents in their friend set. Remember, it is their job to fuck things up from time to time. It helps to remember how much you fucked things up at the same age. And yes, it is true, bigger kids and come with bigger problems.

Somewhere between 18-24. Some of the one's who didn't learn any painful lessons between 14-18 will learn some of those lessons now. Depending on when your kid learns those lessons you stop being stupid somewhere in this time span.

Good luck!
 
DeacMan said:
General overview of stages of parenthood -

Birth to walking - constant exhaustion. To answer almost every question you may ask - yes, that's perfectly normal and it will be fine.

Walking to age 4 - they are always one step away from death; constant suicide watch. Again, yes that's perfectly normal and it will be fine. No, your child is not a savant. They are a toddler. Easier than birth to walking and more fun.

4 to 11ish - sweet spot; enjoy every minute of it even if it feels exhausting. Again, yes that's perfectly normal and it will be fine. No, your child will not be going to the Olympics or Juliard.

11ish to 14 - You are a taxi driver who get's slightly dumber each year. Still fun.

14 to 18 - Hanging with other parents. You get some of your life back. Remember, nothing good happens after curfew. At least pretend you are aligned with their friend's parents or vice versa. Also, you have as much control as the most lenient parents in their friend set. Remember, it is their job to fuck things up from time to time. It helps to remember how much you fucked things up at the same age. And yes, it is true, bigger kids and come with bigger problems.

Somewhere between 18-24. Some of the one's who didn't learn any painful lessons between 14-18 will learn some of those lessons now. Depending on when your kid learns those lessons you stop being stupid somewhere in this time span.

Good luck!
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Yes.
 
PhDeac said:
CH, sounds like your son is a good kid who’s going to do the right thing far more often than not.

Good insights here. Thanks.
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Yeah CH is doing great as a parent. His kid is way, way more mature, apparently, than I was until about age 22. Impressive. And his kid is 6’ 4/235. Future Tight end for the Deacs? OLB? Look at nick Andersen...
 
Reading though this again, we’ve clearly been hoodwinked. CH just wanted to #humblebrag on his 6-4/235 responsible kid.
 
PhDeac said:
Reading though this again, we’ve clearly been hoodwinked. CH just wanted to #humblebrag on his 6-4/235 responsible kid.
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Ha. I will add this was his 2nd traffic incident in 2 months. The first one was an accident. He's a total meathead.

This is also the same kid that when he submitted some college apps noted "oh, its only 70k to go here" to which we said "You know that per year right". He paused for a moment, thought about it and said "Are you serious?"....
 
mako1331 said:
Anybody ever accidentally popped your kid’s back when you pick them up? I lifted up the 2yo today and it sounded like someone stepping on bubble wrap.
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All the time with the 2yo and 4yo. I was worried the first time, but the 4yo told me she doesn't feel it so it must be fine.

My wife is always yelling at me to "be careful with their necks!" when I'm roughhousing with the kids, even though it is MUCH more likely that I'm going to injure myself.
 
Back in the 90's as a high schooler in Long Island NY, I am pretty sure it would have been easier for me to acquire heroin than a 6-pack of bud-lite. Drugs are every where, it is just a matter of teaching your kids how to be smart and careful (i.e., not get caught and not get hurt). Sounds like CH is on the right track. I really worry about my older daughter (14). She has significant, diagnosed, emotional and mental health problems and she is headed down a troublesome path despite all my efforts to get her help and support and treatment. It's really stressful.
 
birdman said:
Back in the 90's as a high schooler in Long Island NY, I am pretty sure it would have been easier for me to acquire heroin than a 6-pack of bud-lite. Drugs are every where, it is just a matter of teaching your kids how to be smart and careful (i.e., not get caught and not get hurt). Sounds like CH is on the right track. I really worry about my older daughter (14). She has significant, diagnosed, emotional and mental health problems and she is headed down a troublesome path despite all my efforts to get her help and support and treatment. It's really stressful.
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I am really sorry to hear this. I hope things work out. Its amazing when parents recognize it, support their kids and take action on these issues. Shes lucky to have you as some parents just dent there is an issue. When I was growing up, MH issues were taboo for many. Im glad that is changing. Again, I hope things work out for her.

Oh and dont do drugs, Mmmmkay.
 
picking through some pet picks to post on the pet thread and couldn't help posting. My 6yo's thing is going shirtless lately. kinda got the Tom Petty pandemic hairdo going too and his hippie mother and I can't bring ourselves to cut it

PMZTWWL.jpg
 
BillBrasky said:
I'm all ears man. Thank you.
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Our daughter had some mild reflux for the first 4-5 months that we treated with a prescription med, but she seems to have grown out of that thankfully. It definitely impacted her more during feeding, but also could cause some sleeping issues from time to time

We still give her Mylicon and a probiotic (Ther-Biotic for Infants) everyday, which I don't know if they actually have a huge effect, but they can't hurt.
 
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DistrictDeacon said:
Our daughter had some mild reflux for the first 4-5 months that we treated with a prescription med, but she seems to have grown out of that thankfully. It definitely impacted her more during feeding, but also could cause some sleeping issues from time to time

We still give her Mylicon and a probiotic (Ther-Biotic for Infants) everyday, which I don't know if they actually have a huge effect, but they can't hurt.
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Thanks dude. We've been using Mylicon, but not Ther-Biotic. We will look into it.
 
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