Sitting in my front yard last night around 9 PM with wife and kiddos and El Chupe and deacondeuse69 and his wife and kiddos listening to Phish and setting off WEAK NC fireworks. Neighbor across the street comes out and sets off theirs, a couple of which are bottle rocket style. Another neighbor down the street comes out and sets off a couple firecrackers.
Suddenly, some old timer bolts out of the woods from the adjoining neighborhood yelling at everyone and saying he's calling the cops. Yelling about how it scares dogs and people can blow their hands off. Neighbors get all nervous, so my wife and deacondeuse69 go down to diffuse.
Wife pulls the "we're all adults, everyone is being safe, kids are enjoying it" card and dude is having none of it. Threatens to call the cops and the FBI (not kidding), so deacondeuse69 tells him he is calling his bluff and that he should go call the cops. Dude starts yelling about how he is a lawyer (WTF?). Deaconduese69 is a lawyer also (as is his wife, and me, and like 1/2 the people on street). Yes, but he has "tried cases." Deacondeuse69 has tried cases too. Yes, but he has tried cases "all over the world." Deacondeuse69 has tried cases all over the world too (he lies). Yes, but he has tried a case in Venice. This angry dude really said this.
Anyway, he finally storms off. At that point it is fully dark, some new neighbors from down the street come out and start setting off LEGIT big time loud SC-style illegal fireworks and it is fucking hilarious. Greatest neighborhood fireworks show ever.
Cop actually does roll up about 15 minutes later and laughing says, "someone called the police because people are setting off fireworks...on July 4....imagine that." Then just smiles at us and drives off.
Probably will never see angry old man again. Did he really exist? Was it all a mass hallucination?