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Totally Unofficial 2019/2020 Premier League Thread (NWT)

I've been over this before, but all players with "bert" anywhere in their name should be called "Bert." None of this Bobby Firmino or Albie Moreno or Andy Robertson shit. Bert Firmino, Bert Moreno, and Bert Bertbertson.

Bert and Ernie were hanging out one hot day. Bert gets up and goes to the kitchen.

"Hey, Ernie, I'm going to get some ice cream, would you like some?"

"Sure, Bert."
 
There have been no solid Liverpool rumors for a while now, though I'm still holding out (a fool's) hope for, like, an O. Dembele/Junior Firpo shock swoop, but there is a little Dani Ceballos stuff floating around today, and I'll take it. But it's all bullshit, Liverpool aren't buying anyone other than Sepp and maybe Harvey Elliott, which was another thing I saw bouncing around the internet the other day.
 
City are activating the buy-back clause to get Angelino from PSV (they sold him there just last year after he was on loan a few places), so I guess that's their left back purchase.
 
There have been no solid Liverpool rumors for a while now, though I'm still holding out (a fool's) hope for, like, an O. Dembele/Junior Firpo shock swoop, but there is a little Dani Ceballos stuff floating around today, and I'll take it. But it's all bullshit, Liverpool aren't buying anyone other than Sepp and maybe Harvey Elliott, which was another thing I saw bouncing around the internet the other day.

interesting article

https://www.goal.com/en/news/a-20-y...a-26-year-old-salah/9g3qufj7qbe318432hlidbko2
 
Like, he’s not Dembele greatest dribbler of all time -level, but he’s still an elite dribbler and is better at all the other stuff than Dembele. He’s going to be fun to watch.

My latest dream for Liverpool is a Nicolas Pepe (Sturridge replacement), Junior Firpo (Moreno replacement), and Dani Ceballos (eventual Lallana replacement) — trying to stay positive.
 
Things getting spicy between Atletico and Barcelona. Griezmann announced he was leaving Atleti in May, widely assumed Barca was going to buy him out at 120 million euros.

Today Atletico release a statement alleging that Barca and Griezmann had already negotiated a deal back in March, during the season, specifically just after losing to Juve in the CL. Barcelona now want to pay the 120 release clause in installments, but Atletico is pissed about the in-season dealings and are saying they won't accept anything less than lump sum.

Oh, and they've told Griezmann, his agent and lawyers they expect him to show up for pre-season training next Sunday.
 
I think this is mostly just posturing from Atletico. They need that 120 at this point, no matter how they get it -- got a lot of cash for Rodri, but bought Joao Felix, bought Marcos Llorente and Hector Herrera, and still need to officially buy Morata, replace Lucas, Filipe Luis, etc. Their squad is super thin at the moment.
 

Thanks for sharing. They're definitely not at the Chelsea level of farming out kids, but a few of those guys are interesting. I kind of wish Grujic had gone with Eintracht this season as opposed to returning to Hertha. Eintracht are in Europe, and Hertha will have a brand new coach. The previous guy, Pal Dardai, loved him, though, and maybe he's just comfortable.

I'm guessing most of these guys end up elsewhere in the end, though.
 
Klopp describing AOC and Brewster (and Gomez and Lallana) as "new players."

“If Ox can stay fit – new player for us,” the boss told Liverpoolfc.com.

“Rhian the same; he is a really big talent. We’re really looking forward to seeing him in training and all that stuff. It will be an important role for us, we planned an important role for him. So, new player.

“Like Joe Gomez is pretty much a new player. Adam Lallana, new player. After a lot of problems last year, if these boys can really stay fit then that’s completely different to last year for the team because there is real quality. That’s cool.”

Christ. Not really encouraged by this. Maybe it's just boiler plate, cliche, first day of the preseason positivity shit. Just give me one or two real new players, Jurgs.

https://www.liverpoolfc.com/news/fi...opp-oxlade-chamberlain-gomez-lallana-brewster
 
Sepp is a lot taller than I realized. And Klopp's surprised, too. I thought he was about Klopp's height (not small), but I guess when you're 17 shit can blow up quick.

 
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Damn, well, it was just a dream anyway. I'm sure Lallana will be fit for five games before January.

FWIW it was just as reporting from Spain. Not solid sourcing. I'd take that radar tho.
dani_ceballos_radar.png
 
Not a lot of minutes there, but yeah, he's good -- been the best player over the past two Euro U-21s. He even kind of runs like Lallana. I've seen a few different conflicting things, and it might be an AS v. Marca bullshit contest, Madrid stirring the waters to see if they can build on his U-21 and free some space for Pogba, but the Spurs thing seems more legit to me for some reason; maybe it is the added touch of including a personal Pochettino call to seal the deal.
 
Peter Crouch
"Before the CL final we went karting. I get to the turn, and I say to myself, "I'm going to brake," except my brakes are loose, I saw Xabi Alonso and Kuyt in front of me, and I asked myself the question, "Who is the more important of the two?" So I ran into Kuyt.

Crouchie is too good for this world.
 
Messi and Medel just both got sent off in the 3rd place Copa America game for what looked like a chest bumping fight.

 
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