I'm gonna need a ruling.
My job doesn't require that I carry a duty weapon. However, I consistently interact with people who have a propensity to be violent. I have multiple instances of individuals with unhealthy mental health records who have attempted to do me harm (physical or otherwise). It's not a daily thing, but when it happens, it's usually a surprise in how it comes about. I have never had to draw, but, about once a month, I think to myself, "thank fucking god I'm carrying."
Thus, I carry a small handgun. Springfield Armory 9mm 4".
Am I the gay?
It's twice the length of my cock, so I score major points there.