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How Many Times Have You Been High?

Girl scout cookies arrived today. Don't mind if I do.

I will say, I've been around adult kangaroos and they're not that cool, but these baby kangaroos look awesome:



Was watching Jersey Shore last night and there's a scene wherein the Situation is talking to his friend The Unit on the telephone about how Deena's sister is a squirter. Only they kept bleeping the word "squirter." So the conversation went like: "Oh man, she's a [bleep]er? I did know she [bleep]ed. I've never been with a chick who could [bleep]." So ultimately you knew they were talking about squirting, but they never actually used the word. Then I wondered why it was appropriate for them to show that conversation, but not appropriate for them to actually air the word "squirt," as if it was the f-word. Kinda like when they talked about Deena giving rimjobs last season. I would like to have witnessed that conversation among the MTV people.
 
Recent email I received from El Chupe American Hero:

Best part is that previous tenant accidentally sent some christmas packages -- including two live olive tress that I had to save -- to their old address (new bungalow) and this same father came around the other day to pick them up. I knew he was going to be getting in touch with me but it had never been specified when that actually was. So it was cold and nasty outside and, naturally, as soon as I got home I got blazed out of my face.

I'm watching this soccer game and I hear a knock at my screen door and this dude is there. Place smells like weed, my eyes are bloodshot, and I start talking to him about these trees. We shoot the shit for a bit, finally he goes to leave and says "hey, you should take advantage of that raised bed out there and grow some good stuff, it's half top-soil, half manure." I'm all, is he saying what I think he's saying or is he thinking that because I was stoned talking about the olive trees that I'm all in to gardening and shit.
 
I really love space stuff (best getting strong experiences of my life have been 3D IMAX movies -- Space Station 3D and Hubble 3D), but I am completely freaked out by the idea of actually going to space. Like, the idea of being in a space capsule makes me anxious. How do they eat up there? Real talk: I get weird about eating when I'm on a plane sometimes. Just something about trying to swallow food when you're up that high gives me the willies. Actually, the entire thought of space and our Earth's place in it sort of freaks me out if I stop and REALLY think about, so I try not to do that very often. Just the idea that I'm occupying this little space in a universe that goes on forever and ever...fuuuuuuuuck, man. I mean, think about that.

Anyway, nice mash-up of cool space stuff with a song I like by Lemon Jelly. I've posted another Lemon Jelly video in the past. I really don't listen to them that much, but they're great for listening when you're strong:

 
Also, I totally did not intentionally type out that little troll face. I just typed the f-word with a bunch of "u"s in there and it made the troll face. I'm not a big fan of the troll faces.
 
Dude I can give a strong talk about space and earth that will make the Sydney harbor whales sound like childsplay.
 
mine are at an all-time low... the lady broke the volcano this week in her worst week of busy season. she was SAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALTY. at least i got a package from a-ville last night via rj. the strength is coming back ot the district.
 
what a weird party we had last night. i just got out of bed and put my feet in an egg. an egg.
 
Pretty good prank. Can't ya take a yolk?

Seriously though. I have taken two bingers and am watching Dan Le Batard's show for the first time. As awful as this show is, I still think I can incorporate some of his bits into some serious shtick on the listserv. He is a homeless man's Tosh. Is this old, foreign guy always with him?
 
Today is awesome. Great full day of strength.

Went to Maggianos and then did some mall shopping in Tyson's. Came back and decided we'd get super strong/drunk and go watch Ghost Rider 3D.

5:20 showing. Outtie.
 
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please tell me I'm not the only one who's played Robot Unicorn Attack (no homo)
 
Wife just left for work. Time to get strong and fire up the PS3. It's going to be a good night.
 
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