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CTCT: Featuring the Human Selfie Stick

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My wife is the most beautiful woman on earth. That being said, she just called me to tell me she was going to Lowe's to buy new flooring for the house that will be installed while we're gone. I ask simply, "did you measure the rooms to know how much flooring we need?" Her answer was "I know how many square feet we have in our house. It's listed online. I'm not stupid." I tried to calmly explain to her that that's not how it works and now I'm an asshole that wants to crush any dreams she has for making the house prettier.
 
mako1331 said:
My wife is the most beautiful woman on earth. That being said, she just called me to tell me she was going to Lowe's to buy new flooring for the house that will be installed while we're gone. I ask simply, "did you measure the rooms to know how much flooring we need?" Her answer was "I know how many square feet we have in our house. It's listed online. I'm not stupid." I tried to calmly explain to her that that's not how it works and now I'm an asshole that wants to crush any dreams she has for making the house prettier.
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Oof.

Also, who's going to be home to supervise this project if you're both gone?

Hope there's some good make up sex.
 
mako1331 said:
My wife is the most beautiful woman on earth. That being said, she just called me to tell me she was going to Lowe's to buy new flooring for the house that will be installed while we're gone. I ask simply, "did you measure the rooms to know how much flooring we need?" Her answer was "I know how many square feet we have in our house. It's listed online. I'm not stupid." I tried to calmly explain to her that that's not how it works and now I'm an asshole that wants to crush any dreams she has for making the house prettier.
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It’s her secret bank account money, let her spend it.
 
You're putting in new flooring ? Don't you usually just hire somebody to do that and it starts with them coming to your house ?
 
BarcaDeac said:
y'all exchange knowing glances, or you going over there just to "see what they're exhibiting"?
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We haven’t made eye contact yet. I’m actually going to have a 15 minute covert meet and greet with her boss in about 30 minutes. It’s all quite interesting honestly

If I get an offer tonight and accept do I show up to the other booth tomorrow? Like an MLB player traded mid series? 😊
 
WindyCityDeac said:
We haven’t made eye contact yet. I’m actually going to have a 15 minute covert meet and greet with her boss in about 30 minutes. It’s all quite interesting honestly

If I get an offer tonight and accept do I show up to the other booth tomorrow? Like an MLB player traded mid series? 😊
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a ceremonial changing of the lanyard and badge
 
WindyCityDeac said:
We haven’t made eye contact yet. I’m actually going to have a 15 minute covert meet and greet with her boss in about 30 minutes. It’s all quite interesting honestly

If I get an offer tonight and accept do I show up to the other booth tomorrow? Like an MLB player traded mid series? 😊
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Do both jobs until your current employer fires you.

Or, be really edgy and ask that woman's boss if he/she's hitting that and keep your current job.
 
Biff Tannen said:
You're putting in new flooring ? Don't you usually just hire somebody to do that and it starts with them coming to your house ?
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You'll laugh, but the guy installing it is the husband of the lady that babysat my kids and cleans my house. He put the tile in our bathrooms. Up here everyone has 27 jobs.
 
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