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Asking Her Dad's Permission

How long have you been dating this chick.

The last thing I remember was you being emo about some ex-GF.
 
Just went through this and asked the FIL if he could meet up for drinks sometime. He was out that night so he popped over to a bar close to me. We drank beers for a couple hours and then the moment seemed right. He said yes and we did shots.
 
"I think i'm going to be shitting once every hour for the next 24 hours." ~ Waldo circa 10 AM
 
my wife's dad lives in FL and has been an absentee-semi-douchebag for most of her life, so I didn't bother with him. I did go over to her mom's house and ask her, which went well. it was emotional because her mom had terminal cancer at the time, and we all knew she wouldn't be around too much longer, so the whole "I promise I will take of her" bit was a little more real than usual. She ended up living five more years and getting to know our kids before she died.
 
waldo met her online

he is flying to russia to talk to her dad

(all you gotta do is send him a check buddy)
 
Deacon923 said:
my wife's dad lives in FL and has been an absentee-semi-douchebag for most of her life, so I didn't bother with him. I did go over to her mom's house and ask her, which went well. it was emotional because her mom had terminal cancer at the time, and we all knew she wouldn't be around too much longer, so the whole "I promise I will take of her" bit was a little more real than usual. She ended up living five more years and getting to know our kids before she died.
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This story raises an interesting question. When is it appropriate not to ask for the father's permission? If the two arent close? If that parent are divorced?
 
I concur with the advice above. I waited for a weekend when my now-wife and mother-in-law were out of town. Called my FIL up and asked him if he wanted to go grab something to eat. He was actually pretty pleased, I think, but we'd always gotten along well anyway.
 
Manifest Destiny said:
This story raises an interesting question. When is it appropriate not to ask for the father's permission? If the two arent close? If that parent are divorced?
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When the bride doesn't have a good relationship with her dad and doesn't expect him to be active involved in her life going forward.
 
Manifest Destiny said:
This story raises an interesting question. When is it appropriate not to ask for the father's permission? If the two arent close? If that parent are divorced?
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I think you need to ask somebody. Of course if she doesn't have any family that would be tough to do.
 
Manifest Destiny said:
This story raises an interesting question. When is it appropriate not to ask for the father's permission? If the two arent close? If that parent are divorced?
Click to expand...

I don't think there is a hard and fast rule. My grandparents didn't divorce until my mom was grown, but my dad asked my grandmother instead of my grandfather. He didn't meet my grandfather until their wedding.

I think the best way to know is just to ask your girlfriend, what does she want as far as that is concerned.
 
WFUWaldo said:
Doing this tomorrow and am honestly much more nervous about this than popping the question. Give me some good stories (or horror stories) to calm me down.
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Congratulations! It will no doubt go better than you can imagine!
 
I told my mother-in-law to be at a Football game - 'you know we're probably going to get married, right?' i may have been a little durnk
 
Manifest Destiny said:
This story raises an interesting question. When is it appropriate not to ask for the father's permission? If the two arent close? If that parent are divorced?
Click to expand...

If you want dad to pay for the wedding, you better ask.
 
Manifest Destiny said:
This story raises an interesting question. When is it appropriate not to ask for the father's permission? If the two arent close? If that parent are divorced?
Click to expand...

Wondering that as well. My girl's dad situation similar to deacon923 in the dad category. Not getting married but it made me think
 
Congrats Waldo. I did this a few months ago and it was pretty awkward but at least it makes for a good story. Initially I wanted to stop over to their house and ask in a more private setting, but then her family set up a reservation at Village Tavern (Reynolda Village) so we went there instead. After we ordered our dinner I launched into why their daughter is awesome (spent a lot of time rehearsing what I would say), and I looked at her dad and asked for his permission. Of course he said yes. The awkward part was that I forgot to pay for the dinner. I found out from my fiance that her parents were upset I didn't pay, and that it reflected poorly on my social etiquette skills. It was really embarrassing but I just take it as a learning experience and now I overcompensate by giving them gifts at every opportunity (flowers, bottles of wine).
 
I talked to my FIL pretty early on. I asked him to lunch, so he knew something was up. We met at the old 3 dollar in ATL. We ate wings and had a few beers and then, he said "Boy, I know you asked me here for a reason...." So, that made it easy. He set me up with the jewler the family uses and ended up loaning me a little less than a grand so I could get the setting how I wanted it. Pretty cool. Not sure how he fucked up so bad raising Heavy P.
 
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