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This is the year! I believe!

RicoSuave

RicoSuave

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I just received this message in a fortune cookie at the local Chinese buffet. I have a good feeling.

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I'm more concerned with the Demon Deacons. Not that I dislike Soccer USA but I just don't have the same emotional investment as I do with the Deacs.
 
Back in my single days, I was physically fit and very conscientious about my appearance. And gay guys would come onto me all the time, especially when I lived in Atlanta. I tried to be cool about it and not homophobic, but if I was at a bar the gay dudes would creep me out by being so forward and explicit about it. And I never even went to gay bars, but normal places like American Pie on Sunday night or Cabo Wabo on Fridays. I befriended a couple of gay guys, and one of them actually got mad and quit talking to me when I told him that he was a cool guy to hang out with but I had no interest in buttsex. He worked at the local video store (then was back when you had to actually go to a video store and rent movies from an actual person rather than a machine), and one time I asked him if they had "Little Shop of Horrors" in stock. He got this strange smile on his face, and told me he'd order it for me and call me when it came in. A week later he called me and said he had my movie, and when I went to pick it up he had it wrapped in fancy wrapping paper with a bow and it was brand new, rather than in a rental box, and he said "this is my gift to you". I offered to pay him to rent it from the store, and he just kept saying it was his gift to me. When he asked if he could come over and watch it with me, I was like "OK I guess, I mean you bought it and I don't even know your name." And when I was in grad school, I was in a serious relationship with a woman whose high school boyfriend had come out of the closet (she never expected it, but she said she did find it strange that all he ever wanted from her was handjobs), and when I finally met him he had the gall to get up and high-five my girlfriend for dating someone as hot as me. But thats a whole nother story. Now, I'm slightly overweight and wear lots of boring clothes in dull earth tones and homosexuals don't hit on me like they used to.
 
I always thought that Brooke Shields (she played the ghost of Hannah's dead mother) was the hottest person on the Hannah Montana Show.
 
OHY! Boys II Men could rock an R&B love ballad!
 
LOL I had a GF in college who gave me all kinds of grief about peeing in the shower with her one morning (I did not pee on her, but peed directly into the drain). She was yelling at me so loudly that other guys in our suite came over to see what the problem was. When she told them that I peed in the shower, they agreed with me that it was OK.

A few weeks later, we took a shower together after a night of heavy drinking. She wasn't a big drinker but she'd tied one on that night. In the shower she started laughing hysterically, and when I asked why she said "I'm peeing!". She then started singing the words "pee pee pee pee" to the tune of some 80s song. Thats when I knew she was a keeper and we dated exclusively for over a year.
 
I love when Rico goes to his local Chinese buffet:

But today, I was the blackest mutha fucker in town. I drove my Mercedes Benz to the local Chinese buffet restaurant, and I parked in an unauthorized area! They didn't even try to tow me because they didn't want a cap in their ass! Not only that, but I went inside to eat, and I filled my plate full of fried chicken wings (rather than the healthier vegetable and seafood options)! I had such a swagger when I left, I turned my car radio to the local urban music channel and cranked it up. There was a catchy tune on about "so what we drink, so what we smoke weed ...", and I was blasting it, bitches. Shit!
 
qcdeac said:
I love when Rico goes to his local Chinese buffet:

But today, I was the blackest mutha fucker in town. I drove my Mercedes Benz to the local Chinese buffet restaurant, and I parked in an unauthorized area! They didn't even try to tow me because they didn't want a cap in their ass! Not only that, but I went inside to eat, and I filled my plate full of fried chicken wings (rather than the healthier vegetable and seafood options)! I had such a swagger when I left, I turned my car radio to the local urban music channel and cranked it up. There was a catchy tune on about "so what we drink, so what we smoke weed ...", and I was blasting it, bitches. Shit!
Click to expand...
this quote is worthless without a boogity reveal pic--maybe, say, one from Halloween.
 
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