K vs. Roy in a UFC fight

Who would you pull for?

K would drstroy Roy...but Roy being the Forest Gump of coaching would win. Just before Roy would tap out through his crying and tears, K would hurt his back giving the match to Royboy.

Roy would get heckled walking to the ring, and would turn around and walk right back to the locker room.

How is they both pass out not an option?

Obviously K will win by referee decision.

Screamindemon3 said:

How is they both pass out not an option?

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Passing out is too easy, that's why I went with the wearing depends and eating through a straw option.

K would repeatedly punch Roy below the belt but the ref would be too intimidated by his glare and his potty mouth to call anything.

dot com said:

Obviously K will win by referee decision.

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Honestly I think Roy would have the upper hand if he went for takedowns, all Roy would have to do is go for the takedown and K would flop right on his back and cuss out the referee for not calling a charge.

RJKarl said:

K would drstroy Roy...but Roy being the Forest Gump of coaching would win. Just before Roy would tap out through his crying and tears, K would hurt his back giving the match to Royboy.

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lol what a perfect description.

I went with K by submission. Something tells me he doesn't fight fair.

PotentPotables said:

lol what a perfect description.

I went with K by submission. Something tells me he doesn't fight fair.

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Voted same. K would always be three moves ahead of Roy, who I think would submit rather quickly. Mental image: The smirk on Ratface while he bends back Roy's pinky finger until Roy cries for mommy.

I don't know, I think some of you guys are selling Roy short. I'm sure he get some good experience wraslin around with the pigs down on the farm when he was but a wee hillbilly.

Maybe if Royboy entered the cage playing Deliverance on the banjo, K would immediately throw in the toeal.....not the one covering his butt.

Roy would win; K is frail.

I picture the fight as something like this.
http://youtu.be/2bkRGH4sJDE

There's not a question in my mind that a) Roy is a giant pussy, and b) K would absolutely fight dirty.

Back in 2009, I did a whole analysis of a potential ACC coaches steel cage deathmatch. Sort of funny to read in retrospect, especially since almost all these coaches are gone:

1/18/2009

ACC Basketball Coaches Steel Cage Deathmatch -- Who Would Win?

We started to get into this on the "Dreamy Dino" thread, but lest we interrupt the swooning, I think this topic is long overdue for serious thought and its own dedicated thread. Here's the scenario:

All 12 ACC coaches. A steel cage. No weapons. Who wins?

A few of my thoughts on the coaches individually:

- Dino Gaudio:

Pretty sure he would be favored. I have no idea how old Dino is (I know his daughter graduated from Wake in the past couple of years, so he's gotta be approaching 50 at least), but beneath the tailored suits he seems like a pretty chiseled dude and probably the most well-conditioned coach in the ACC. Add in the blue collar, rust-belt background and the Italian heritage and I'm assuming his fighting skills are sufficient. Odds of victory: 3:1.

- Dave Leitao:

The top-ranked challenger. He's a tall drink of water. He appears to be in good shape. He's frequently seen berating and cussing his own players on the sidelines, which means he's kind of a dickhead and probably would not hesitate to resort to bush league tactics. Watch your balls, Dino. Odds: 4:1.

- Paul Hewitt:

Shares the same physical characteristics as Leitao (tall, long reach, low % of body fat), but I just don't see the same intensity in Hewitt. I'm also skeptical of anyone who earned his college degree in Journalism. That just doesn't seem like the educational background of someone who is going to really kick your ass. Also doubtful to bring much in the way of Xs-and-Os fighting strategy into this event. Odds: 8:1.

- Al Skinner & Oliver Purnell:

As I mentioned on the other thread, I see these guys adopting kind of a 30s-style boxing technique -- a "put up your dukes" style of fighting, if you will. It's probably due to their awesome, old school black guy moustaches. These would be the most entertaining fighters of the bunch. Odds: 10:1.

- Roy Williams:

I don't see this ending well for Roy. He's definitely the pretty boy of this crowd and is very emotional. I think someone like Gary Williams would take a lot of pleasure in trying to wipe the tan off his face and make him cry (these would be tears of physical pain, not the emotional pain that comes from Jacque Vaughn and "the best Kansas team ever" getting schooled by Miles Simon and Mike Bibby in the Sweet 16). I think Ol' Roy would find himself unconscious fairly quickly. Odds: 50:1.

- Leonard Hamilton:

Perhaps due to his resemblance to Apollo Creed's trainer, Hamilton seems like the older dude whose experience and street smarts would make up for any physical shortcomings. He would be like the white-haired guy on the tennis court who is slow and doesn't have any velocity on his shots, but can hit the ball wherever he wants and will aim it right down the lines every single shot. I have a feeling the crowd would get behind him. Odds: 8.5:1.

- Mike Krzyzewski:

Probably somewhat dangerous due to his Army background and temper, but you can't help but think that he is long past his peak as a fighter. If this fight had taken place in 1986, K would stand a much better chance. He's also very short and would have a tough time defending against the long reach of Leitao and Hewitt. You also know that all the other coaches would relish the opportunity to get in a lick on Krazooski. I could actually envision Skinner and Purnell teaming up briefly to use K like a punching bag. Flopping is not a technique that is going to lead to success in the steel cage. Krazooski would be better off feigning a back injury prior to the fight and sending Nate James in his place. Odds: 25:1.

- Sidney Lowe:

In addition to the fact that he is woefully unfit, Sid the Kid AKA Smiling Sid seems soft to me. This fight isn't simply about physical skills -- you also have to WANT it. And I don't think Lowe has sufficent fire in the belly. As Jamie Escalante from "Stand and Deliver" might say, Lowe appears to lack the "ganas de." I kind of see Lowe getting punched hard in the gut early on by someone like Frank Haith, and proceeding to go down like King Hippo. Odds: 30:1.

- Frank Haith:

Haith seems like he'd be amongst the last men standing. He's stocky and built kind of like a trash can, and I think he'd probably use the low center of gravity to his advantage. Seeing as how the U is also kind of the forgotten ACC basketball school, I'm sure Haith would enjoy the opportunity to step into the spotlight. Odds: 6:1.

- Seth Greenberg:

Greenberg would probably bring little to the fight, but it seems like he's pretty well-respected among his ACC coaching peers, so I suspect they'd go easy on him. I could totally see a scenario in which Leitao has sucker punched Dino in the kidney, and Coach K has taken the opportunity to start kicking Dino in the stomach while he is down on the ground. Suddenly a hand grabs Coach K by the shoulder, spins him around, and there stands Greenberg, who proceeds to punch K right in the mouth, knocking him to the floor. Greenberg then extends an arm, helps Dino up, and together they start kicking ass. Odds: 30:1.

- Gary Williams:

The wild card. Gary is older and not exactly a big guy, but he's obviously crazy and I guarantee the other coaches will have one eye on Gary the entire time they're in the cage. No weapons are allowed in Thunderdome, which is good since Gary would probably wreak havoc with a chainsaw. In the absence of weaponry, I think Gary would lean heavily on his own biological weapons -- fingernails and teeth. I'm picturing Gary perched animalistically over Coach K (who is curled in the fetal position like that time he fainted on the court against GT), gnawing feverishly at Coach K's ear. In summary, when I think of Gary in this event, I think of Dennis Hopper's character in "Blue Velvet." Odds: 5:1.

Interested to hear your thoughts.

It's shocking how many of those coaches aren't even in the ACC anymore.

PotentPotables said:

It's shocking how many of those coaches aren't even in the ACC anymore.

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Anyone wonder why the ACC is having problems as a whole?

Sounds like we need a new Death Match analysis.