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The Pit Parenting Thread

bmoneydeac said:
Birdie is being a handful at bedtime lately. She will not stay in her bed. We'll walk her back and put her back in bed, give her quick, stern instruction to stay in bed, and leave. Two minutes later, she's back out of bed. The last few nights have been just terrible (1-2 hours of this shit). Ugh, she's been so good otherwise. Anyone else go through this?
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We're not there yet (ours is about 18 months), but we did go to a class about a year ago and that topic came up. The instructor said to do essentially what you're doing- take her hand, walk her back to bed, and leave. Though she said that you shouldn't say make a big deal of it, because then it turns into a game. So something like "birdie, it's time to go back to bed," walk her there, put her there, and repeat as necessary. Might take a few days.

Right now, I just want someone to lie to me and tell me that my daughter is going to start sleeping through the night...
 
bmoneydeac said:
Birdie is being a handful at bedtime lately. She will not stay in her bed. We'll walk her back and put her back in bed, give her quick, stern instruction to stay in bed, and leave. Two minutes later, she's back out of bed. The last few nights have been just terrible (1-2 hours of this shit). Ugh, she's been so good otherwise. Anyone else go through this?
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You're doing the right thing. I would say to tell the first time you put her back in bad to not get out again, then each subsequent time, day nothing and unceremoniously put her back - no talking, no tucking her in, etc. Don't let her make it a game or a reason to have extra mom/dad time.

If you catch her coming out of her room, does she run back to get into bed or just look at you like "what are you going to do about it?"

If the former, if the just putting her back in bed doesn't work, one of you could sit outside her for for about 10 minutes (not talking)
 
Definitely the latter. It's been going on for a couple of weeks now but we just started the stern, put your ass back in the bed and walk out routine two nights ago. I'm hoping it sticks. It is completely zapping my wife's and my nights together. The entire time before we go to bed is about making sure she stays in bed. Really sucks.
 
bmoneydeac said:
Birdie is being a handful at bedtime lately. She will not stay in her bed. We'll walk her back and put her back in bed, give her quick, stern instruction to stay in bed, and leave. Two minutes later, she's back out of bed. The last few nights have been just terrible (1-2 hours of this shit). Ugh, she's been so good otherwise. Anyone else go through this?
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Just put in a call to the ped about similar bedtime sleep issues with E. Also contacting a friend who is a sleep psychologist. Will let you know if we get some awesome tip or advice. Our house is in such upheaval this week but the 2-3 hour bedtime is a mess.
 
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yodeacsgo said:
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The funny thing is last week she broke out in some hives from something and we hit her up with some benadryl and it knocked her TFO. Most peaceful night we'd had in a while. Don't think that the thought of giving her a bit just for one night of reprieve has not crossed my mind.
 
We have been going through this with our 2 year old during the past month, many horrible nights where she completely freaks out when we try to put her in bed. Finally spoke with the Pediatrician about it and he suggested a mix of positive reinforcement with tough love. He said to tell her to stay in bed, if she does, we'll leave door open. If she leaves her room, we'll have to close the door.

He said that will obviously happen, and when we close door, she'll cry. Go back in after a few mins. and say the same thing. Repeat until she is in bed and keep stretching the time out.

I was skeptical but this worked wonders. She did cry night one, but I only went back in once. By the next night, she settled immediately and has gone to bed on first try every night since.

Good luck
 
HalIncandenza said:
Don't make the HS girl go. Graduations are pretty lame and missing out on the last day with the celebrations and what not with people she's grown up with before they all part ways would really suck.

The college girl just needs to get over it. Take the pictures some other time. It's not worth bringing along the HS girl and making everyone else suffer for it. The college girl will be with her friends. The HS girl with hers.
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Agree here. Sounds like hell for HS girl.
 
On the graduation dilemma, y'all's advice is pretty consistent with what I have been thinking - we really don't have much of a choice. Forcing the HS'er to miss her last day would just make her and everyone miserable. The college girl needs to get over it - and maybe she will with time.

To answer some questions - the girls are very close and the older girl just really wants her sister there. Plus she is kinda big on family and tradition so it really upsets her to think we will have all these pictures and for years it will be like "but where was HS-girl?". And, she won't have any true family pix to upload to Instagram!! ):
And, anyway, they are girls! That means emotions and moods and... well, all you men know. I love my daughters to death but it would have been nice to have a son in there somewhere to lighten things up.

lbe or someone mentioned something that I had been thinking of as well - having the HS'er make something special for her sister to try and soften the feelings. Maybe a scrap book or a nice letter or something.

Anyway - wish us luck.
 
scooter84 said:
On the graduation dilemma, y'all's advice is pretty consistent with what I have been thinking - we really don't have much of a choice. Forcing the HS'er to miss her last day would just make her and everyone miserable. The college girl needs to get over it - and maybe she will with time.

To answer some questions - the girls are very close and the older girl just really wants her sister there. Plus she is kinda big on family and tradition so it really upsets her to think we will have all these pictures and for years it will be like "but where was HS-girl?". And, she won't have any true family pix to upload to Instagram!! ):
And, anyway, they are girls! That means emotions and moods and... well, all you men know. I love my daughters to death but it would have been nice to have a son in there somewhere to lighten things up.

lbe or someone mentioned something that I had been thinking of as well - having the HS'er make something special for her sister to try and soften the feelings. Maybe a scrap book or a nice letter or something.

Anyway - wish us luck.
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things like this are so hard to address because the temptation to say "nobody actually cares, and when we explain the situation they'll understand her absence" is real... but probably wouldn't go over well. I"m in none of my little bros college graduation photos (actually, i'm in very few family photos from the last 3 years in general...) and it does suck, but I will say it makes you appreciate the full family time you DO get. hopefully she can come around to that and not let this be 'a thing' for too long.

yeah, good luck.
 
I have gone through the not staying in bed routine with my now 7 and 4 year olds. This is what has worked for us:

1. Put child in bed
2. Tell her that you are going to [insert random task that she won't want to participate in...brush teeth, do the dishes, etc.] but that if she stays in bed, you will be back to check on her in X (start small) minutes.
3. Come back in X minutes to check on her.
4. Tell her that you have to [insert random task], but that if she stays in bed, you will come back in x minutes.
5. Come back in X minutes.
6. Repeat as often as necessary, stretching out the time between coming back a bit with each visits. Fortunately 2 year olds can't tell time.
7. You might have to come back 8 or 10 times the first night, but by the 3rd night or so, child will be asleep when you come back the first time.
 
RevDeac06 said:
Right now, I just want someone to lie to me and tell me that my daughter is going to start sleeping through the night...
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She will start sleeping through the night. If she's anything like my daughter, it will be right around her 3rd birthday. It is the reason why my daughter has no siblings.

scooter84 said:
On the graduation dilemma, y'all's advice is pretty consistent with what I have been thinking - we really don't have much of a choice. Forcing the HS'er to miss her last day would just make her and everyone miserable. The college girl needs to get over it - and maybe she will with time.

To answer some questions - the girls are very close and the older girl just really wants her sister there. Plus she is kinda big on family and tradition so it really upsets her to think we will have all these pictures and for years it will be like "but where was HS-girl?". And, she won't have any true family pix to upload to Instagram!! ):
And, anyway, they are girls! That means emotions and moods and... well, all you men know. I love my daughters to death but it would have been nice to have a son in there somewhere to lighten things up.

lbe or someone mentioned something that I had been thinking of as well - having the HS'er make something special for her sister to try and soften the feelings. Maybe a scrap book or a nice letter or something.

Anyway - wish us luck.
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Considering I skipped my last day of HS as well as my college graduation, I can't offer much help. But, I liked the sisterly scrapbook idea. No way I'd make the youngest go.
 
HS girl has already planned a party at your house once you leave so of course she doesn't want to go
 
my parents told me there were monsters under my bed and that was enough to keep me in it when i pulled that crap. You could always dress up like a monster and then when the kiddo walks out of the room scare the crap of em.
 
JamesSokolove said:
my parents told me there were monsters under my bed and that was enough to keep me in it when i pulled that crap. You could always dress up like a monster and then when the kiddo walks out of the room scare the crap of em.
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Just had a great experience at my oldest son's preschool picnic. I talked to one of the moms of a girl in his class she raved about how sweet and well behaved he is on field trips and how her daughter talks about him all the time. It's great to get those positive reports from other parents especially only months until he starts kindergarten.
 
perler beads! i used to GO TO TOWN with those things.

you're not cool unless you've got the glow-in-the-dark ones, though.
 
Just wanted to point out that lbE has 28 posts on this thread and zero children.
 
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