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Critique the critic - Watch this short film that I made

WakeFanatic

WakeFanatic

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Here's this short film that I wrote, edited, scored, and co-shot/co-directed. So if you have time please watch (in 720p, it looks terrible in the other settings), and let me know what you think. Here's your chance to turn the tables on me and tell me how bad my movie is ;)

It has some language in it, so NSFW.

 
I'm sure having the protagonist not act like a nearly blind person from the onset was an artistic decision of some sort, but it was a distraction.
 
sucked more than eyes wide shut :)
 
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A young LT and street meth head playing the main characters?
 
The opening was good, but I was lost after that. A lot boring and useless conversations going on afterward.
 
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LOL at the "soon to netflix instant" tag. I liked the John Carpenter Escape from New York style soundtrack- I thought that was the best thing about it. Considering you were basically a one man crew; the writer, composer, editor, cameraman I gotta respect the effort. I think all the handheld footage would've benefited enormously from better stabilization- what camera did you use? Some shots with something like a slider would've also helped the production values big time- as well as someone who knows something about lighting. Considering the lack of gear you had I was kind of impressed with the recorded audio- it wasn't great but if you just used the camera's mic it wasn't that bad. You might find this vid helpful for your next project:
 
Beyond the production values, I'd cut out a ton of the dialogue. Try to tighten up the script and chop it down to about 5 minutes. The soundtrack is pretty cool though. Stan should've been the star.
 
BobStackFan4Life said:
LOL at the "soon to netflix instant" tag. I liked the John Carpenter Escape from New York style soundtrack- I thought that was the best thing about it. Considering you were basically a one man crew; the writer, composer, editor, cameraman I gotta respect the effort. I think all the handheld footage would've benefited enormously from better stabilization- what camera did you use? Some shots with something like a slider would've also helped the production values big time- as well as someone who knows something about lighting. Considering the lack of gear you had I was kind of impressed with the recorded audio- it wasn't great but if you just used the camera's mic it wasn't that bad. You might find this vid helpful for your next project:
Click to expand...

Thanks for the tips, I'll def check out that video. It was for a class, so we used the camera that the class designated, the Panasonic HVX. It's an okay camera, I had several problems with it, and I wouldn't really want to use it again. I agree on the stabilization thing, and I had to go handheld more often than I wanted to cause the tripod they gave us was acting really weird. Lighting is the area where I need the most help, I know nothing about it really, and unfortunately that other "director" wasn't very helpful on any front.

We only had a few days to shoot this, and we were severely limited on time cause our actors were theater people who had other things to do, so we had to rush to get everything done. As for the script, the intended tone was perhaps a little lost, I wanted it to be a bit darker and a little monotonous, like the guy is apathetic towards what's facing him, but what read well on the page perhaps is just boring on the screen here. I'm cutting it down to 8 or so minutes for the final cut, this was just the "director's cut." Also I'm really glad people seem to like the score, this was the first time I've ever made any sort of music, so I'm happy to see that people like that part of it perhaps the best.
 
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