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Is it worth having kids?

I'd only get married if it was in my best financial interests.

Never, ever going to have kids. I'm considering getting a vasectomy and I'm 22.
 
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Wakeforest22890 said:
I don't know. When I got to Wake I didn't want kids, now one semester away from being done with Wake I think it'd be cool to have kids in the future.
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I know, it's just funny to say "when I was younger I thought this... but now that I'm older I think this..." when discussing anything from the ages of 15-22.

its like a fifth grader saying "when i was younger (1st grade) i wanted to be a firefighter, but now that i'm older i've decided on astronaut"
 
Had my son at 37 and wouldnt trade being a father for anything in the world. Being a parent has a way of keeping you centered. However, I would have liked to been between 30 and 33 but that part didn't work out for me. (Most here know my story on becoming a parent.) I had my time to myself and all the fun and craziness of youth in my 20s and became more settled down by my 30s. When you meet certain people and see them interact with children, you get a great idea of those who are just meant to be parents. Its not a bad thing nor is it a good thing - just some are more "parently" than others.
 
I've got a 4-year-old and am in my mid-30s. I love my daughter very much but another one would literally kill me. I was looking back at a picture of myself about 5 years ago and I look like I've aged about 15 years (now I know how presidents feel). So, one is going to be it for us. I'm also looking forward to losing the daycare expense in another few months. I can't lie, the idea of not spending another $250k on a follow-up act has its appeal.
 
Eh. I know a wealthy couple that had both of their sons die from congenital heart defects. I also know a woman whose family owns a company you have all heard of and may use whose health is not good and has had organ transplants and still fights to live (no kids). While I understand that kids are expensive, I am sure in both these cases these people would trade all their money for their children or their health. The odd thing about money is that when you have it it does not seem that important but when you don't it does. Who knows. Do what you want.
 
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buckets said:
I know, it's just funny to say "when I was younger I thought this... but now that I'm older I think this..." when discussing anything from the ages of 15-22.

its like a fifth grader saying "when i was younger (1st grade) i wanted to be a firefighter, but now that i'm older i've decided on astronaut"
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Yeah I mean I guess...I'm 21 years old and much more mature than I was when I was 17
 
I've been married 9 years, I've got one daughter who is 4 1/2 and I'm 33. My wife and I had originally planned on having another about a year ago, but that plan came to be before we had our first. It has since changed, though mostly due to financial considerations, not due to being sick of the one we already have. My wife and I made sure that we did plenty of travelling and so forth before our daughter was born, because you never know will happen afterwards. While there are many things I have done in my life that I regret, having a daughter is not one of them. I do totally agree that it depends on the person. If you don't want kids, you shouldn't have them. I despise parents who are apathetic towards their children. The other side is just as true. If you want to have children, you will be able to make it work out, especially if you are reading these boards.
 
1) Already married but I think I'd still want to have a kid even if I never got married*
2) I don't really have a specific number in mind. The goal is being close to debt free and having some savings. If we waited until we made a lot of money we'll never have kids.
3) We're planning on kids once we've been married for 2 years so we'll be about 27. Ideally I'd probably have wanted a kid sooner than that so my minimum would be 24 or 25 and maximum probably 40 (but probably only if I didn't have any kids yet).


*I realize this is probably different for a woman
 
TheTwinAndreBen said:
Really? Regale us with tales of all the exciting things you do in Raleigh, North Carolina, post-35.
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You're right. Nothing going on here.

We just sit at home and play pinochle. Sometimes we go out to see R-rated movies, but there's usually too many kids there so we have a hard time hearing the picture show.

:rolleyes:
 
RaleighDeacon said:
Who's to say in 30 years they're even still talking to you anyway.
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Yikes. I realize that's a possibility, but if that's something in the forefront of your mind when thinking about this topic, it's not surprising you don't want to have kids.
 
HailToTheDeacons said:
Yikes. I realize that's a possibility, but if that's something in the forefront of your mind when thinking about this topic, it's not surprising you don't want to have kids.
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I merely brought it up since the assumption of a lot of people seems to be their kids will take care of them when they are older (and most will). That doesn't mean it's a given, and would never be reason enough to not have kids.

Also, I am not violently anti-children. I just don't want my own.

OK, I am violently anti-children when I try to go out and eat in Cary. Maybe that's where my venom toward kids comes from.
 
I think the decision as to whether to have kids is intensely personal. Two of my best friends decided early on never to have kids and they are happy as clams.

We were 45 and 38 when our son came home. We started trying five years earlier. Honestly, I'm a better mom emotionally and mentally now than I would have been then, but I would definitely have been physically better off f it had happened earlier. But after everything we went through I would never say it wasn't worth it.
 
What I've found is most married peeps who choose no children had some pretty fucked up childhoods/parents.

#realtalk
 
RaleighDeacon said:
I merely brought it up since the assumption of a lot of people seems to be their kids will take care of them when they are older (and most will). That doesn't mean it's a given, and would never be reason enough to not have kids.

Also, I am not violently anti-children. I just don't want my own.

OK, I am violently anti-children when I try to go out and eat in Cary. Maybe that's where my venom toward kids comes from.
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I don't think many people have kids so someone will take care of them. You could take the money you would spend on a kid, save it, and have enough to get nice nurse sponge baths everyday into your twilight. Of course... being from Raliegh maybe people around you also have kids to help out on the farm? I kid, I kid (get it... kid).
 
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