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Totally Unofficial 2023/24 Premier League Thread

Just get rid of VAR and use semi-Automated offsides.

I love Nunez for some reason. I think I enjoy chaos agents in sports like soccer, basketball etc. every time he scores I smile
 
He makes the tough ones look easy but wide open goal it’s like he panics about how bad he’s going to look when he misses!
 
Darwin Núñez is the first Premier League player to register at least 10 goals and 10 assists in all competitions this season. [Opta]

 
https://www.espn.com/soccer/insider...pool-darwin-nunez-premier-league-best-players

Since 2018, no Premier League team has converted more than 15.7% of its chances over a full season. The team that reached 15.7% conversion? That was Manchester City last year, but even for arguably the greatest English club side we've ever seen, that means that they were missing 84.3% of their shots.

Tottenham's Son Heung-min is probably the best finisher of the modern era of the Premier League, and he's scored on only around 18% of his shots for Spurs. The uber-poacher of that same era, Leicester City's Jamie Vardy, scored with just 20% of his shots.
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Núñez fails more than anyone, but that's largely because he tries more than anyone.

Last season, he led the Premier League with 4.5 shots per 90 minutes. That was the highest rate in the league, by a good margin. Among players with at least 1,200 minutes played, the next most aggressive shooters were Manchester City's Erling Haaland and Fulham's Aleksandar Mitrovic, at 3.8 per 90. This season, Darwin is once again at 4.5 shots per 90, once again leading the league, with Haaland, once again, in second at 3.8.

Notice how consistent Núñez and Haaland's numbers are? That revels another truth about shots: while your team and teammates certainly help, the ability to generate attempts on goal is largely an individual skill.
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Still don't believe me? Here's the list showing all of the other players to take at least four shots per 90 minutes in a Premier League season since 2016-17:

  • 1. Harry Kane, Tottenham, 2017-18: 5.3 shots
  • 2. Sergio Aguero, Manchester City, 2016-17: 5.2 shots
  • 3. Sergio Aguero, Manchester City, 2019-20: 4.5 shots
  • 4. Gabriel Jesus, Manchester City, 2019-20: 4.4 shots
  • 5. Mohamed Salah, Liverpool, 2017-18: 4.4 shots
  • 6. Philippe Coutinho, Liverpool, 2016-17: 4.3 shots
  • 7. Zlatan Ibrahimovic, Manchester United, 2016-17: 4.3 shots
  • 8. Sergio Aguero, Manchester City, 2018-19: 4.2 shots
  • 9. Sergio Aguero, Manchester City, 2017-18: 4.1 shots
  • 10. Mohamed Salah, Liverpool, 2019-20: 4.0 shots
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One way to interpret this list is that there are three players to hit at least four shots per 90 minutes in a season twice since 2016. One is Darwin Núñez, and the other two are Sergio Aguero and Mohamed Salah -- two of the five or 10 best players in the history of the Premier League. The players who generate as many shots as Núñez has through his first one-and-a-half Premier League seasons are almost all stone-cold superstars. Most of the guys who did it once are or were superstars, too.
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And yes, it's not just about shooting the ball a lot. Not all shots are created equal. Bad shots can actually make your team worse because they eliminate the possibility of a higher-quality attempt being created later in the possession in exchange for a low-quality shot with little chance of going in.

Núñez, though, isn't really doing that. The average xG value of his attempts since joining Liverpool is 0.15. That's well below Haaland's rate of 0.21, but he is taking more shots than Haaland. Plus, the average shot in the Premier League has an xG value of 0.11, so he's still above that. Add it all up, and among players with at least 30 starts since last season, only Haaland is averaging a higher non-penalty xG rate per 90 minutes: 0.8 to Núñez's 0.7.
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Add it all together, and Núñez is tied with Haaland in leading the Premier League in non-penalty xG+xA per 90 minutes at 1.0. And even with the poor finishing, he's averaging 0.8 non-penalty goals+assists per 90 since the start of last season. Among these 30-game starters, only Haaland, Salah and De Bruyne have been more productive.
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Núñez is already keeping elite company, and there are a number of reasons to think he's only going to get more productive. At 24 years old, he's just entering his prime. His non-penalty xG+xA rate has risen from 0.93 last year to 1.03 this season. Same goes for his actual production: 0.67 non-penalty goals+assists per 90, up to 0.97 this year. Plus, there's no guarantee he continues to finish his chances at a below-average rate, either. In his last season with Benfica, he was nearly seven goals above his expected total. Most players, over their careers, tend to regress -- positively or negatively -- toward their expected goals.
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That's the promise of Darwin Núñez, but the reality is that he doesn't even need to improve. Just take a look at the list of all the players in Europe's "Big Five" leagues with at least 10 goals and 10 assists across all competitions this season.

... Just kidding. There is no list. After scoring those two goals against Bournemouth on Sunday, there's just one player. It's Darwin Núñez.
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Figured I'd share their review of DV's favorite player.
 
No talk of Gio Reyna joining powerhouse Nottingham Forest? I think that's their 40th signing in 2 years.
 
So Martial just had groin surgery and is out for at least10 weeks. This guy is made of balsa wood. Can't wait until he's gone.
 
wasted talent

guys like him piss me off more than just about anything in sports. so much talent and it is just wasted on a person that doesn't fucking care. so annoying.
 
Damn that's truly a way to ruin a Friday.... Guess we need to just send him off with a Quad..
 
It will either deflate the Liverpool players, or more likely, give Liverpool a huge lift as they want to send off their manager with some silverware.

Here is hoping to it being the former!
 
This may be because I mostly root for shitty teams but I've never been this down about a coach/manager leaving a team I support before.
 
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