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Chat Thread: 10s: HOF, 20s: kid kungfu sphincter paralysis, 50: Chick-fill-A-hole

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mako1331 said:
When you have them, that whole selfish thing goes out the window, because you're genetically preconditioned to love the little shits. I genuinely don't enjoy the hobbies I used to devote myself to like golf that would take me away from them for an extended period of my limited free time. Shit changes significantly, but it's been an enjoyable change for me. It sounds lame as fuck, but the best time I have now is watching them having a good time, and I'm cool with that.
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I'm a new dad and am hoping I have that perspective ultimately. As of now, I find it hard not still wanting to get out of the house and get selfishly drunk, or watch football all day and not do anything productive. Granted, the kid isn't even old enough to smile yet, other than the fake fart/poop smiles. Hoping here soon when I see a smile or two that I'll forget about anything else and just become infatuated with the little one.
 
CreamyGoodness said:
I'm a new dad and am hoping I have that perspective ultimately. As of now, I find it hard not still wanting to get out of the house and get selfishly drunk, or watch football all day and not do anything productive. Granted, the kid isn't even old enough to smile yet, other than the fake fart/poop smiles. Hoping here soon when I see a smile or two that I'll forget about anything else and just become infatuated with the little one.
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i think for dads it takes until they're mobile in some way and/or start communicating.
 
WRS said:
We are on the fence about having kids and so are many of our friends. Some of the reasons are selfish (less time and money to do shit) but we also aren’t super enthusiastic about where the world is headed on a number of levels. Looking out to perhaps 2100 (or beyond) the environment figures to be totally FUBAR.
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JuiceCrewAllStar said:
yeah, climate change and overpopulation are definitely parts of the essays

I'm biased because I like my adopted siblings more than my biological siblings, but I've never had a strong desire that my kids -- should I have them -- be of my seed
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I hate how much of a dick I'm going to be here.

Dude, this post is the most fucking cuck/pussy bullshit on the face of the planet. I'm not going to go all biological imperative or 'good catholic' on you, but fuckin' A, dude - the culmination of the biology that brought you to where you are today is a direct result of people much older than you raw doggin' 'til things got sloppy while surviving horrendous shit. You do those individuals a disservice by selfishly choosing to end your line. You may feel that you're your own person and owe them nothing. However, their hard work and sacrifice through the ages provide the life you live today - your advantaged position in this world is zero'd. Your intelligence. Your traits; positive and negative. Absolutely eliminated.

Maybe your feelings are the result of some fucked up combination of natural selection in your own genes and the sum of the environmental condition, but fuck me - I hate it. Dudes like you - well educated, civil, thoughtful; shit, a lot of things that I'm not, should be procreating like god damned rabbits. If we're ever gonna get to Mars, it's a near certainty that it's going to be the kid of a dude who raised his son to be educated and hard working.

Maybe you can adopt a baby and impart that. Good luck.
 
CreamyGoodness said:
I'm a new dad and am hoping I have that perspective ultimately. As of now, I find it hard not still wanting to get out of the house and get selfishly drunk, or watch football all day and not do anything productive. Granted, the kid isn't even old enough to smile yet, other than the fake fart/poop smiles. Hoping here soon when I see a smile or two that I'll forget about anything else and just become infatuated with the little one.
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Wait 'til the potato pupates and turns roughly five. The "dad love" graph improves strongly from 40 months on. Levels off around 7-8, but only because you've basically reached the fucking top of the chart.
 
mako1331 said:
This. They pretty much fucking suck for the first 5 or 6 months especially.
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Dude, fuckin' call it like it is, it's three years of basically non-stop suck. The first 5 or 6 months are horrendous because wifey is usually down for the count then as well.
 
CreamyGoodness said:
That was the first think I thought of. Only type of broad who would post that type of shit on a family neighborhood recs forum is someone who is looking to get railed out by someone other than her seedless husband.
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Fuckin' Juice's wife lives in Biff's neighborhood. Yo Biff ! Where you live? Imma tag a side piece.
 
Jesus, this thread turned into everything a man can desire. Good work GTB, as always.

As far as my baby, sounds like I have between 1.5 - 3 yrs before I'll enjoy my child...Cool with that...Just gotta keep the wife happy and do my part when called on.
 
My two year old is going through an awesome phase of requiring that only Mommy does things for her when I’m trying to dress her/feed her/etc and wife is around. Tantrum ensues until I trudge over to the wife to tap her in. But when I’m the only one around she’s totally cool and happy with everything. She’s evilly manipulating us.

Point being that I’m not fully out of the woods yet on the drudgery vs cool kid.

And apologies for continuing the conversion of chat thread to parenting thread.
 
Grabs Turds Bare said:
I hate how much of a dick I'm going to be here.

Dude, this post is the most fucking cuck/pussy bullshit on the face of the planet. I'm not going to go all biological imperative or 'good catholic' on you, but fuckin' A, dude - the culmination of the biology that brought you to where you are today is a direct result of people much older than you raw doggin' 'til things got sloppy while surviving horrendous shit. You do those individuals a disservice by selfishly choosing to end your line. You may feel that you're your own person and owe them nothing. However, their hard work and sacrifice through the ages provide the life you live today - your advantaged position in this world is zero'd. Your intelligence. Your traits; positive and negative. Absolutely eliminated.

Maybe your feelings are the result of some fucked up combination of natural selection in your own genes and the sum of the environmental condition, but fuck me - I hate it. Dudes like you - well educated, civil, thoughtful; shit, a lot of things that I'm not, should be procreating like god damned rabbits. If we're ever gonna get to Mars, it's a near certainty that it's going to be the kid of a dude who raised his son to be educated and hard working.

Maybe you can adopt a baby and impart that. Good luck.
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Jesus, the nerve it takes to post this shit.
 
06deacon said:
My two year old is going through an awesome phase of requiring that only Mommy does things for her when I’m trying to dress her/feed her/etc and wife is around. Tantrum ensues until I trudge over to the wife to tap her in. But when I’m the only one around she’s totally cool and happy with everything. She’s evilly manipulating us.

Point being that I’m not fully out of the woods yet on the drudgery vs cool kid.

And apologies for continuing the conversion of chat thread to parenting thread.
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yeah, dads are worthless unless mom isn't around. i did feel pretty bad when my daughter asked me to do her hair for school the other day and the best i could do was a 3/4 ass ponytail
 
TownieDeac said:
Jesus, the nerve it takes to post this shit.
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Don't turn it into some socioeconomic/race bullshit. Go spend four years studying biology. Shit matters. There's no cap on racial capacity. Just like there's no cap on cultural capacity.

But fucking look at what the statistics for a kid with a loving, caring father like Juice would be vs. an absentee dad. It ain't good. Team that up with Juice's obvious intellectual skills (kid graduated from a great school, amirite?) and you've got a dude who has strong odds of making a very happy, successful baby/child/young man/man.

I have no idea what racial demographic Juice hails from (strong probability he's whitebread af); I've never met him. It isn't relevant to my point.
 
I’ll let juice pick this battle if he wants. I was simply saying you make a metric fuck ton of presumptions.
 
TownieDeac said:
I’ll let juice pick this battle if he wants. I was simply saying you make a metric fuck ton of presumptions.
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It’s callous as fuck, but if you’ve ever said that the US is currently making Idiocracy look like a documentary, you’re basically saying the same thing, right?
 
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