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Are you divorced?

P

PhillyDeac

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Philadelphia, PA
What was your situation when it happened (do you have kids, ages)?
Did a specific event/series of events trigger it (i.e., an affair)?
Was it just worn out over time?
What are your thoughts now, in hyndsight?
 
No. I've been very happily married for 17 years to my bride, whom I met on a blind date my junior year at MSD.

I am, however, divorced from the reality that has befallen Wake Forest basketball.
 
loving relationships are cool, but marriage in our society seems silly and contorted.

I'm making these numbers up but if 50% of marriages end in divorce, another 10% stay together due to not believing in divorce, another 10% stay together due to inertia/can't do better, and another 10% who married for reasons other than love not hitherto mentioned and stay together for those reasons (arranged, property, politics, appearances, etc.)..how many marriages actually conclude with one partner dying and both still in love? it would seem to be dismally small.

so i don't believe in marriage. it was never really invented for love to begin with anyway. historically in most cases that was a secondary consideration.
 
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dmcheatw said:
loving relationships are cool, but marriage in our society seems silly and contorted.

I'm making these numbers up but if 50% of marriages end in divorce, another 10% stay together due to not believing in divorce, another 10% stay together due to inertia/can't do better, and another 10% who married for reasons other than love not hitherto mentioned and stay together for those reasons..how many marriages actually conclude with one partner dying and both still in love? it would seem to be dismally small.

so i don't believe in marriage. it was never really invented for love in the first place...
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Interesting take. So what is love, in your opinion? Whatever one wants it to be?

Been married two years in October, been with her for 6 years total (she's 4 years younger or else I would've put a ring on it sooner). I know I'm young, but love her and can't imagine going through life without her. Definitely a better person thanks to the wife.
 
if i recall, the psychology books define love as either passionate or compassionate. passionate love is the "i have to see you all day every day" that you typically only feel for one person at a time, and eventually transitions into compassionate love over some months or years. compassionate is basically everyone else.

that's really great u have a wife, and a great relationship...so what did you need the ritual ceremony for? seems superfluous and an necessary life risk should things turn sour. i really think to stay HAPPILY married would be one of the hardest life goals to accomplish.

but i'm also a pessimist.
 
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Dmcheatw, one day you'll find a righteous woman who likes good TV shows and will smoke reefer with you from time to time, maybe give you the sex as well. That's the one with whom you lock it up. It's gonna happen for you, buddy, I just know it.
 
Appreciate the honest discourse. How do you define love, though?

The truth is I out-kicked my coverage so I'm doing my best to keep her happy.

Truth be told, we had a small wedding. But yes, we had a ceremony. My wife and I are both Christians, so we sought to have our marriage consecrated before God by way of a preacher (in our opinion), a la many other weddings. The same preacher who took us through marriage counseling to prepare us for marriage.

Anyway, yes, marriage isn't easy, and times get sour. But, with the right woman, and you know when it is right, it is amazing and sharpening. It's hard to describe, especially as a 29 y/o man, but I firmly believe that I will happily be with her until I/she dies.

She might feel a different way, though ;)
 
dmcheatw said:
loving relationships are cool, but marriage in our society seems silly and contorted.

I'm making these numbers up but if 50% of marriages end in divorce, another 10% stay together due to not believing in divorce, another 10% stay together due to inertia/can't do better, and another 10% who married for reasons other than love not hitherto mentioned and stay together for those reasons (arranged, property, politics, appearances, etc.)..how many marriages actually conclude with one partner dying and both still in love? it would seem to be dismally small.

so i don't believe in marriage. it was never really invented for love to begin with anyway. historically in most cases that was a secondary consideration.
Click to expand...

The divorce rate for college educated people married after 25 is closer to 20-25% than 50%.

50% for all marriages also includes teen marriages, habitual divorcees etc.

http://www.time.com/time/magazine/article/0,9171,1989124,00.html
 
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Nelly Furtado said:
Dmcheatw, one day you'll find a righteous woman who likes good TV shows and will smoke reefer with you from time to time, maybe give you the sex as well. That's the one with whom you lock it up. It's gonna happen for you, buddy, I just know it.
Click to expand...

Did you just associate dmcheat with smoking reefer?

As the tag says, "google dmcheatw"
 
Marquee Moon said:
Did you just associate dmcheat with smoking reefer?

As the tag says, "google dmcheatw"
Click to expand...

It's gonna be tough for dmcheatw to find a bride willing to get down with injecting opium and shit, so I'm assuming for the right broad he'd tone it down a bit and settle for smoking some decent grass, like a real upright citizen.
 
Nelly Furtado said:
It's gonna be tough for dmcheatw to find a bride willing to get down with injecting opium and shit, so I'm assuming for the right broad he'd tone it down a bit and settle for smoking some decent grass, like a real upright citizen.
Click to expand...

What about blow? Is that a deal breaker?
 
Nelly Furtado said:
Dmcheatw, one day you'll find a righteous woman who likes good TV shows and will smoke reefer with you from time to time, maybe give you the sex as well. That's the one with whom you lock it up. It's gonna happen for you, buddy, I just know it.
Click to expand...

negative. now if she's making 300k/yr THAT's the one you lock up.
 
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