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Chat Thread CCLXV: DDD takes a lover

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My 6 yo daughter came down for breakfast this morning and told my wife that she spilled a little water in her bed and we might want to dry it up.

For some reason, that didn't really raise any red flags. When my wife went up there to help her get ready for school, my daughter again said that she might need to dry the bed a bit in the front.

So my wife finally takes a look and sees that my daughter had peed all over her bed. Full bladder release. Which doesn't happen often anymore, but she sleeps through pretty much anything (it is impressive). When pressed about this, my daughter said that she lied because she didn't want us to be mad (understandable, but silly). She also told us that it happened in the middle of the night and she decided to just go back to bed because she didn't care enough to wake us up.

My daughter would rather just sleep in a bed of her own pee rather than walk down the hall to have us change her sheets. Actually, when I write it out it kind of makes sense.

Having said all that... She has never shit outside at school like she's Nell or something.
 
It's nice and warm sleeping on sheets soaked in your own urine.
 
Similar story, we took my fiance's niece (12) and nephew (10) to the Miami bball game last year. They're "indoor kids" so we figured we need to drag them to sports stuff, which they actually really like when they get there.

Anyway, we figured we would make it an overnight trip from Durham to give their parents a break. After dinner and ice cream and stuff we got back to the Airbnb and were putzing around for a while. I went to the bathroom and the floor was covered in piss and one of the towels was soaked through. I made a hard turn straight out of there and our niece was like "Uncle Frosty I think [nephew] peed his pants. His pants in our bag are really wet".

At this point it was clear what happened so I was like "Hey, dude. Did you pee yourself? No worries if you did. We've all been there. Just need to figure out what we need to do and I don't want to accidentally touch anything" and he just straight up lied to my face about it. Not even just lying, but gaslighting me being like "I think there's a leak in the bathroom" and "Those aren't my pants".

It was also an inhuman amount of pee. It was shocking how much was on the floor of the bathroom, let alone the fact that his pants were drenched and a towel totally saturated in it.
 
When I was a kid, I always wondered how my parents could tell I was lying so easily.

Now that I am a parent, it is almost comical how terrible these lies are that my children tell.

But as they get older, I can definitely tell that my ability to spot their lies is going to completely disappear and I'll need to step up my detective game.
 
TownieDeac said:
i've never had any reaction whatsoever to a jab except sore arms, guess i'm just built different

taking malaria pills different story tho
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Probably related to your lack of sympathy for the Havana sufferers.

"State Department ghouls"? wtf
 
TownieDeac said:
@wakephan09 do you always have to separate "too" with a comma at the end of a sentence/clause?

like "I love you, too" for example

my boss does it every time and i have forgotten comma rules so long ago

i always get taken out of whatever i'm reading wondering if it's the correct construction

he's got an english BA from an Ivy, but that doesn't mean anything cause he also has an MBA
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No idea. I don't like it either.
 
YoungBuck95 said:
Lmao the “they’re not my pants” made me laugh. Like bro who is else is fitting into your 10yr old pants
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It was so bold that I honestly didn't know how to react.

Their mom started doing this thing where she lets the kids pack their own bags before trips so they can learn how to do it. Nothing wrong there, but the problem is that she doesn't check their bags before they leave. We took them for a weekend last winter and homie showed up with three bathing suits (we don't have a pool and it was winter), a broken pocket watch, some rocks, a single chess piece, his iPad, and a rats nest of charging cables. That was it. No pajamas. No other clothes. No toothbrush. Just that stuff. Kids are weird.
 
Ah and I forgot the part about how he somehow showed up with two right shoes. Normally I feel like this would be easy to catch, but they were the same exact shoe since he apparently has two pairs of them for some reason. I did feel a little bad about this one though since he was complaining about his feet hurting and I was like well you've kind of been walking like a weirdo. I guess two right shoes will do that.
 
DeacsATS said:
When I was a kid, I always wondered how my parents could tell I was lying so easily.

Now that I am a parent, it is almost comical how terrible these lies are that my children tell.

But as they get older, I can definitely tell that my ability to spot their lies is going to completely disappear and I'll need to step up my detective game.
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My 15 year old is a really good liar. Straight faced, full eye contact, no obvious nervousness lied to me that he did not take a swig out of my heretofore unopened bottle of Talisker but I could smell it on his breath.
 
Upon reflection, I've come to terms with the fact that my parents definitely knew I smoked a ton of weed in high school. There's no way they couldn't have known.
 
It is tough finishing out the day knowing I have tomorrow off. I’m working one 5 day week all of September which is p nice tho.

Also taking only 4 days of vacation for the holidays but having an 11 day break. Also v nice.
 
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