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List of Know Nothing Rube Shit

TheTwinAndreBen

TheTwinAndreBen

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We are getting closer to having an idea what pretentious shit is, but I think some people, as people here are known to do, are missing the point entirely, and actually praising and lauding, in the name of non-pretension, straight-up hayseed, redneck, bobo, rube-eriffic bullshit.

To remedy, I now present the ubiquitous list of straight rube shit. Feel free to add on. Read and learn, rubes:


Knock Off Big Green Eggs
Non-Weber Gas Grills
Propane Grills
Domestic Pilsner
Wine Coolers
Wine Spritzers
Any wine from the USA
Ketchup
Ketchup on Hotdogs
Ketchup on Hamburgers
Catsup
Domestic Cars
Asian Cars
Charlotte
The Carolina Panthers
UNCC
Charlotte Law
Charlotte Restaurants
People who espouse the virtues of Charlotte Restaurants
People who claim they are from Charlotte but actually reside in a -ville, -boro or a Lake Norman trailer park
Charlotte Bobcats
Charlotte Hornets
Kelly Tripuke-a
Dell Curry's Entire Family
Grandmama
Michael Jordan
NASCAR
Mustard Based BBQ
Doofus
Numbers
Doofus/Numbers Eiffel Tower Threesomes
Winston-Harlem Gloryholes
Jeff Bzdelick
NC State
Dillards
Ross
TJ Maxx
Marshalls
8xDeacs
People who bitterly discuss the value of college and law school educations
Student Loans
Twitter
People who Cut the Cord (both doctors and poor digital content farmers)
Usic not on Townie's Best 14,000 Tracks Since 1983
Philly Sports Fans
Yankeefaces
Food Lion
Trader Joe's
2 in 1 Shampoo Conditioner
Non-Pure Bred or Designer Pets
Monica
OC Sports Bars
Microwaves
Frozen Food
Fatties
Fatties with Attitudes
Yankeeface Fatties with Attitudes
Bowling
Cricket
People who wear Sports Jerseys who are not playing sports
Non-Craft Cocktails
Jim Beam
Ron Wellman
Naz-T-Deac
81 Deac
DemunDeac
Fayetteville
People who can't play golf
People who can't swim
Peters Creek Parkway
Black Coffee
Cold Cuts
COSTCO
New Jersey
Seed Lobotzke
The Orbit

and Finally

:cam:
 
i almost stopped reading at "any wine from the USA" but other than that, solid list. a little confused at Black Coffee, though.
 
yeah, don't get the "any wine from the usa" thing. plenty of very good wine on the west coast. most anywhere else you can indiscriminately target and be correct.
 
deaconson said:
yeah, don't get the "any wine from the usa" thing. plenty of very good wine on the west coast. most anywhere else you can indiscriminately target and be correct.
Click to expand...

he must have never had thunderbird or boone's farm
 
ImTheCaptain said:
i almost stopped reading at "any wine from the USA" but other than that, solid list. a little confused at Black Coffee, though.
Click to expand...

Yeah; going to have to explain that one. When you're paying $$$ for good, fresh roasted coffee and taking the time make it slow drip why fuck it up with milk/sugar?
 
I only drink espresso. Drip coffee is rube-icon.


I almost forgot the midwest:

Governor of Indiana
Non-gay wedding service providers
Mayo Sammich eating Hoosiers
Bob Knight
Lebron James
Lebron James' GED
Lebron James' Agent and Entourage
The Rust Belt
Skyline Chili
 
TheTwinAndreBen said:
I only drink espresso. Drip coffee is rube-icon.
Click to expand...

lol don't know many rubes taking the time to drink cold-brewed slow drip coffee, but alright. French press, pourover etc. aren't bad either. It's all about the flavor profile you're after.
 
feel free to give us your definition of rube. feel like there is some inconsistency on an over all solid list.

should probably list "national chain restaurants" i'm looking at you red lobster, olive garden, chili's etc
 
Digiornos
Baked Ziti
Front Wheel Drive
Crocs
Steve Madden
Big Box Retail
Fishing Shirts
Freshwater Fishing
Crock Pot recipes
Softball
Credit Unions
Fox News
Evangelicals
Spanx
The Tea Party
Texas
Ed Hardy
5 Hour Energy
Ed Hardy Energy Drinks
Terrestrial Radio
 
"Bobo" is the best fucking adjective of all time. Surprising when people don't know it. posrep
 
Blueberry flavored beer
Zebras
Dancing with the Stars
Elephants
Liberals
Indoor sports
Krzyzewski
 
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