Your encounters with wildlife

[Deacon923]

I remembered some cool ones

I was climbing an old tree at my sisters house, and when i got about 25-30 feet up I came face to face with a hollow in the trunk, and there was this huge orange owl that was sleeping there. I'm pretty sure that if I had awoken it, it would have fucked me up, and I would have fallen out of the tree.

I think this story is a pretty ironic. I have gone Turkey hunting once or twice in the past, and have never seen a single Turkey on a hunt. When I was in ROTC I spent a summer at Fort Knox, and we had M16 marksmanship training pretty often. One morning on the qualifying range, a flock(?) of 10-15 wild Turkeys randomly walked onto the range, zigzagging around and in front of the popup targets. Everyone had to stop shooting immediately, and we waited like 30 minutes for the Turkeys to leave the range.

I always thought turkeys were pretty clever (for birds) but this has irrevocably changed my opinion.

 

[Baconwfu]

Remembered one

When i was 16 I went hunting in Africa with my Dad, older brother and granddad. We stayed at one camp for a week and we'd just changed to a new camp a few hours away. It was on the banks of the Sabi River in Zimbabwe. Where we were the banks of the river were about 20ft above the river and the bank was sheer so we were protected from crocodiles and whatnot.
Anyway, in the middle of the day you generally don't hunt because animals aren't moving (thus you can't find their tracks as easily) so we were back at camp, had just eaten lunch and usually you take a nap for a few hours (because you get up at bumblefuck in the AM). For whatever reason I couldn't sleep and was stirring (there isn't much occupy your time in the african bush when everyone else is asleep.)
Anyway, I decide to go for a little walk. there is a "road" (really I should say a 20ft wide clearing) that run parallel to the river with a thin strip of 15/20ft tall brush between it and the river bank and similar (but thicker) brush on the other side. It is africa so I take a gun and I tell the PH (professional hunter) that I'm going to walk around. He gives me his side arm as well (just in case). It is Africa, so it's inherentely more dangerouse than walking around some trail in the US, but I'm not going far, I'm pretty well strapped (at this point, .375 rifle and a .45 handgun) and just because to the layout of where I'm walking I'm pretty safe (river with high sheer bank on one side, thick brush on the other, wide straight clearing to walk through). I walk for some time, can't remember how far, but far enough and I see a troop of baboons that look like they are coming out of the river and crossing the path. They see me, but I'm at least 200 yards away so they don't pay much mind. I keep walking towards them and they gradually back up (at this point most are still crossing but a few bigger males have stopped to stare at me) but I'm taking two steps towards them and they're probably only taking 1 step back. Eventually I get to about 75 yards and the big males start making noise and occasionally jumping around then staring at me again. Yet I still walk towards them and they ease back, but I'm still getting closer. I'm at 50 yards and they start throwing something at me as I get closer I realize it's their own shit (which tickles me to no end). The entire time I'm really only fixated with the big males that have stopped in the road, but I'd guess at least 100 or maybe even 200 baboons have crossed the road into the brush.
***As an aside, baboons, especially big males, are vicious animals, mouth of a dog, like most primates, they are quite smart and extrodinarily strong. Adult females can be very small, say 40lbs, while adult males can be as large as 300lbs****
Again, I'm only really paying attention to the big males of the troop because they are the ones that stopped in the road and they are the ones jumping around and throwing shit at me. I get to about 25 yards (tops) from the males and at this point their actions are starting to transition from grandiose acts of intimidation to a more subtle (but more threatening) aggression so at that point I decide I've gotten close enough and start back off.
Now when I first saw the baboons I say they were probably 200 yards away, but between that point and where I am now I probably walked at least 400 yards, so I'm well past the spot where the baboons were originally crossing.
So at at the point where I'm starting to feel like I've gone far enough, but I'm not really worried at this point because, 1) I'm strapped 2) I (think) I'm only dealing with 5 or 6 baboons and they are right infront of me 3) I'm fucking 16 and invincible.
I start to back off slowly and the males start to move towards me (at about the same pace I'm moving away). This troubles me, but not too badly as I can easily dispatch of them if the shit hits the fan. Eventually I put another 25/30 yards between myself and the big males who are still moving towards me, but not quite keeping pace...they are also becoming less animated. I feel a little more comfortable so I figure I'll just turn around and start a normal walk back to camp (at this point I'd just been kind off lazily backpedalling). Of course, the first thing I see when I turn around is a few baboons in the middle of the road about 50 yards from me staring at me.......my heart jumps into my throat and I chamber a round in the .45 about as fast as humanly possible. Then I look around and all the baboons that I thought had crossed the road and kept going were really just hanging in the brush watching everything play out.

At this point, here is the situation I'm in
I'm at least a mile away from the nearest human being, so I might as well be 100miles
I'm surrounded on three sides by hundreds of baboons and a sheer river bank on the other.
I have about 20 rounds of ammunition.

I feel like an absolute retard for not noticing that I was being surrounded, but as I noted yesterday, teenagers are fucking stupid, and I was no exception.

The big males that I'd been originally focused on are now behind me, I peak back and they don't seem to be doing anything and the baboons that are infront of me are probably males, but not as big and not nearly as aggressive. I'm really freaked out, but I'm not at the point where I want to fire off any rounds. so I start walking back towards camp and getting closer to the baboons in front of me and a couple scatter but 2 or 3 stand their ground and start up the intimidation BS that the other ones were doing. I'm literally a stones throw away from them, so that's what I do. I pick up a good sized rock and heave it in their direction and fortunately it frightens off all but one of the baboons (it waivers but holds firm) then I pick a rock that's probably about half the diameter of a baseball and whip it at the remaining baboon, I don't hit it, but only because he moved. At that point he trots into the brush, I kind of turn around to see what's going on behind me (other other baboons aren't doing anything) and then I decide that i'm going to jog until I get out of the gallery of baboons. As soon as I start jogging they all start hooting and hollering (which intially scares the shit out of me) but I guess it was just their "vanquishing the enemy" celebration and that was pretty much the end of it.
When I got back the PH asked if I saw anything and I calmly said, "yeah, I saw some baboons" to which he replied, yeah, those fuckers are mean as shit"

 

[RubbinsRacin]

Ah the ignorance of youth. I can see myself as a kid getting caught up in something like that, whereas today just seeing one of those fuckers at a distance acting remotely aggressive would send me in the other direction post haste. Those fuckers will fuck you up mang.

 

[El Chupacabra]

Not mine, but someone else in Arizona:

The house in which I lived in Tucson backed up to a small wash right at the foot of the Catalinas near Saguaro Canyon and we would see some shit. One time a bobcat was just chilling in our backyard -- it was pretty big and intimidating looking. There was also a tarantula bigger than my fist one day.

If anyone is in the Triangle area they should go to Pittsboro to the Carolina Tiger Rescue and see those things up close (and it is close). They are powerful animals. I know that's not really in line with the thread, but they aren't exactly domesticated, nor would I call it a zoo.

 

[yodeacsgo]

I had a skunk slip into my tent at scout camp once. I was sleeping when it entered and woke up pretty quick. I realized what it was and froze completely still. My friend that was sharing the tent wasn't as calm. He started to freak out. I very quietly told him that I would rip his balls off is he didn't calm the hell down, shut up, and hold still. We sat there completely quite for probably an hour and watched in amazement as the skunk tore open a medium sized bottle of ibuprofen and ate every single pill. After it ate the last pill, it looked around for something else to eat. It looked right at me and its eyes were crazy glazed over. There was nothing else to eat, so it stumbled out of the tent. That was one of my top ten hardest laughing moments. That skunk got effed up on ibuprofen.

We weren't the only tent invaded. Several other campers noticed food items missing, but no one else saw what did it. The next morning we setup a snare trap using a fairly tall tree and aimed it toward a pond. We were only like 16 years old, so it was a very crude trap. Around midnight we heard the trap go off and then came a very loud splash. It scared the crap out of the scout leaders because they didn't have a clue we had rigged up the trap. They were slightly mad at us because it could have scared the skunk and crop dusted the campsite. Doubtful it was the ibuprofen skunk. That SOB surely died the previous night.

 

[jaybone]

I heard the most god awful screaming in the yard last week at about 2AM. I assumed it was a cat getting eaten by a fox. When I got up in the morning to check it out, it was a squirrel. I had no idea that a dying squirrel could squeal so loud.

The coolest thing I ever saw was a herd of giraffes running at full gallop along the side of a mountain in a safari park near Swaziland. It was sort of an ah-hah moment at how dinosaurs must have looked going fast.

 

[RubbinsRacin]

That skunk story reminded me of camping out near key west one winter. We were at a spot right beside an inlet. Racoons were all over the place, as were drunk redneck campers like our neighbors but they were cool. One night the racoones dumped over their grill, which had been sitting on a wooden picnic table, which starts smouldering and goes up in flames while people are asleep. We must have been passed out and slept through the commotion, but woke up to find a 1/4 burned and charred picnic table. Our neighbors had woken up and put out before it got too out of hand. Well, the husband is pissed and says he's gonna fuck those racoons up if they come back. Our group returns from various festivites much later that night, and this dude is up drinking at waiting on the racoones. Some buds and I join the effort. Maybe an hour later we see it lurking back around the campsite. This dude waits for it to get closer and then he fastballs an unopened can of busweiser at it's head and actually hits it right in the face. The thing is stunned for a second, and this dude is already running at it full speed. He punts the thing, sending it flying like a field goal about 25 yards deep into the inlet. Another one of those moments where I'm just sitting there bug-eyed, like did that really just happen?

 

[bojanglefunk]

Not mine, but someone else in Arizona:

A different angle is on the laugh you lose thread.

 

[drew]

How about a little more detail? What the heck happens next after you're bitten by a rattlesnake? Copperhead? Black widow? Man-o-war? Hospital visit?

Copperhead bite was while picking up a pinecone mowing the grass. Got me on the base of my thumb. Went to the ER and puked for a day or so. I didn't kill the snake, so the didn't give me antivenom or anything. Plus the bite was minimal and only minor venom got in me. I fought it off.

Black widow was under the door handle of my car. Right in the palm. Went to the ER. They gave me some shots and watched it for a bit, then sent me home. It hurt for days.

Man o War stung like fire. 1 tentacle thingy wrapped up my calf. I got it off quickly so it didn't scar. Didn't go to the hospital that time, but it stung like a lot of bees.

 

[RollTheQuad06]

I heard the most god awful screaming in the yard last week at about 2AM. I assumed it was a cat getting eaten by a fox. When I got up in the morning to check it out, it was a squirrel. I had no idea that a dying squirrel could squeal so loud.

The coolest thing I ever saw was a herd of giraffes running at full gallop along the side of a mountain in a safari park near Swaziland. It was sort of an ah-hah moment at how dinosaurs must have looked going fast.

Seeing the giraffes sounds awesome. I'd love to go on a safari.

The other week I was getting ready to go for a run when I saw a cat leap into some shrubs and reappear with a baby bunny that was making the most terrible screeching sound. It was rather disturbing because I just don't think of rabbits making noise.

That skunk story reminded me of camping out near key west one winter. We were at a spot right beside an inlet. Racoons were all over the place, as were drunk redneck campers like our neighbors but they were cool. One night the racoones dumped over their grill, which had been sitting on a wooden picnic table, which starts smouldering and goes up in flames while people are asleep. We must have been passed out and slept through the commotion, but woke up to find a 1/4 burned and charred picnic table. Our neighbors had woken up and put out before it got too out of hand. Well, the husband is pissed and says he's gonna fuck those racoons up if they come back. Our group returns from various festivites much later that night, and this dude is up drinking at waiting on the racoones. Some buds and I join the effort. Maybe an hour later we see it lurking back around the campsite. This dude waits for it to get closer and then he fastballs an unopened can of busweiser at it's head and actually hits it right in the face. The thing is stunned for a second, and this dude is already running at it full speed. He punts the thing, sending it flying like a field goal about 25 yards deep into the inlet. Another one of those moments where I'm just sitting there bug-eyed, like did that really just happen?

:laugh:

a few years back, a raccoon was eating out of my birdfeeder, and the metal part of the feeder was smacking against the support pole - a disturbing banging noise to hear right outside the back door at night. My ex quietly opened the back door and grabbed a big grill cleaner scrub brush off the deck and threw it at the raccoon, smacking it straight on. It tumbled off the feeder and off the deck, which was hilarious.

 

[york1313]

I saw the Talking Heads in concert in 89. Does that count?

 

[ChicdeaC]

I also got stung by a scorpion in Galapagos. That sucked.

 

[HeavyPetter]

I got stung by a scorpion in Costa Rica while I was drunk at 1 AM. I couldn't tell if I was having a reaction to the scorpion or not. Turns out I had no reaction other than some immediate pain. Not to self, next time you try to stomp a scorpion, wear something other than flip-flops.

 

[El Chupacabra]

In Arizona (all my weird wildlife encounters are from there) we were told to look out for the translucent scorpions as those were the most dangerous. I saw some big ass buggers there but avoided getting chomped.

 

[ChicdeaC]

I got stung by a scorpion in Costa Rica while I was drunk at 1 AM. I couldn't tell if I was having a reaction to the scorpion or not. Turns out I had no reaction other than some immediate pain. Not to self, next time you try to stomp a scorpion, wear something other than flip-flops.

yeah, I had my epipen ready, but luckily didn't need it...I had a little bit of a reaction but not full blown allergy.

I've had some pretty bad jelly-fish stings and the scorpion felt like a stronger more directed version of that.

 

[TravelingDeacon]

I blocked Knights avatar so long ago that I forgot he even had one. Sorry, guy!

How do you do this!?

 

[yodeacsgo]

I used to work on a freight dock that only had curtains on the doors, so numerous animals climbed up on the dock. It was really bad when we received shipments of cat/dog food. Every stray in the city would be walking around that place. We even had foxes roaming around. The coolest thing I saw was a hawk swoop in and take out a pigeon in the air. It happened about 10 feet from my head. That bird was huge. It latched onto a flying pigeon and attempted to fly out an open door. It misjudged doors and flew into an empty trailer. I heard a big KABOOM and the hawk flew out of the trailer and then out an empty door. It didn't have the pigeon with it when it left so I went into the trailer to check out the mess. The hawk used the pigeon as an airbag when it slammed into the rear of the trailer. There was a crushed pigeon on the floor and feathers were everywhere.

 

[ChicdeaC]

How do you do this!?

I used adblock plus...right click on the avatar and select block image...not sure if there is another way but using adblock is highly recommended by me and not just for avatars

 

[Say Hey Deac]

I actually had to put Knight on ignore, which sucks because he's a good poster. NSFW avatars FTL.

 

[TWDeac]

Use Firefox and adblock. It is ridiculously easy.