Nelly Furtado
Well-known member
- Joined
- Apr 14, 2012
- Messages
- 719
- Reaction score
- 83
From the CT last night, there is confusion about the 4-base baseball system to describe hook-ups. There is no doubt that a 4-base system leaves many gaps, IMPORTANT GAPS, that are needed to be able to evaluate and understand someone else's hook-up. This is an attempt to clarify and see if we can collectively arrive at a more accurate system so that there is no confusion about what WakeGal and WRS did in the bedroom, back when WRS was bedding Pit broads like it was his job and just generally being a huge slut.
My proposal is that instead of simply describing a hook-up as getting to "first base," "second base," etc, we provide greater detail by also including the number of runners plated by your hit (1, 2 or 3 RBI; 4 RBI for a grand slam HR). So instead of being like, "Numbers, guess what?" "What, Doofus?" "I got to SECOND BASE, bro!" "Awesome!" /FIN/ You can be like "Numbers, guess what?" "What, Doofus?" "I got to SECOND BASE and plated a run!" "A run-scoring double? Awesome!" /FIN/ Isn't that much better? Of course it is.
This is my proposed system. Obviously, this is GROUNDBREAKING and CONTROVERSIAL and subject to debate, so feel free to disagree or add or further clarify. Lots of room to negotiate, and you can get pretty damn creative and gross there in the HR category as you contemplate the real freaks out there (Boogity, I'm looking at you). It is also important to recognize this is a living document, as with the rise of OBAMA pretty soon all 3rd graders are going be oral sexing each other on the bus and it won't be a big deal and that will be FIRST BASE and we'll have to adjust our system accordingly.
First Base:
0 RBI - traditional make-out session like what Kevin Arnold and Winnie Cooper did in the pilot episode of The Wonder Years
1 RBI - make-out, whilst squeezing butt over pants
2 RBI - make-out, whilst feeling boobies over shirt and/or bra
3 RBI - make-out, whilst clothed boner presses into chick's crotch aka dry humping
Second Base:
0 RBI - feeling boobies under shirt and bra and tweaking nipples like, "hello there little fella"
1 RBI - suckling naked boobies like baby animal
2 RBI - feeling boner or wajeej under pants a little hows-your-father, but stopping short of full blown hand stuff to completion
3 RBI - handjibber/finger-blasting
Third Base:
0 RBI - handjibber/finger-blasting using commercial lube + fleshlight or one of those lady pleasuring instruments like vibe or fake dong
1 RBI - oral pleasure on weiner or wajeej
2 RBI - oral pleasure on weiner or wajeej + finger or other toy or plug in deuce AND/OR vertical 69
3 RBI - oral pleasure on weiner or wajeej + oral pleasure on deuce
Home Run:
1 RBI - sex, coitus, P in V
2 RBI - P in V + finger or toy or plug in deuce (his or her)
3 RBI - P in V + external finish on or about face
4 RBI - rocking the deuce
My proposal is that instead of simply describing a hook-up as getting to "first base," "second base," etc, we provide greater detail by also including the number of runners plated by your hit (1, 2 or 3 RBI; 4 RBI for a grand slam HR). So instead of being like, "Numbers, guess what?" "What, Doofus?" "I got to SECOND BASE, bro!" "Awesome!" /FIN/ You can be like "Numbers, guess what?" "What, Doofus?" "I got to SECOND BASE and plated a run!" "A run-scoring double? Awesome!" /FIN/ Isn't that much better? Of course it is.
This is my proposed system. Obviously, this is GROUNDBREAKING and CONTROVERSIAL and subject to debate, so feel free to disagree or add or further clarify. Lots of room to negotiate, and you can get pretty damn creative and gross there in the HR category as you contemplate the real freaks out there (Boogity, I'm looking at you). It is also important to recognize this is a living document, as with the rise of OBAMA pretty soon all 3rd graders are going be oral sexing each other on the bus and it won't be a big deal and that will be FIRST BASE and we'll have to adjust our system accordingly.
First Base:
0 RBI - traditional make-out session like what Kevin Arnold and Winnie Cooper did in the pilot episode of The Wonder Years
1 RBI - make-out, whilst squeezing butt over pants
2 RBI - make-out, whilst feeling boobies over shirt and/or bra
3 RBI - make-out, whilst clothed boner presses into chick's crotch aka dry humping
Second Base:
0 RBI - feeling boobies under shirt and bra and tweaking nipples like, "hello there little fella"
1 RBI - suckling naked boobies like baby animal
2 RBI - feeling boner or wajeej under pants a little hows-your-father, but stopping short of full blown hand stuff to completion
3 RBI - handjibber/finger-blasting
Third Base:
0 RBI - handjibber/finger-blasting using commercial lube + fleshlight or one of those lady pleasuring instruments like vibe or fake dong
1 RBI - oral pleasure on weiner or wajeej
2 RBI - oral pleasure on weiner or wajeej + finger or other toy or plug in deuce AND/OR vertical 69
3 RBI - oral pleasure on weiner or wajeej + oral pleasure on deuce
Home Run:
1 RBI - sex, coitus, P in V
2 RBI - P in V + finger or toy or plug in deuce (his or her)
3 RBI - P in V + external finish on or about face
4 RBI - rocking the deuce
