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This will be a Mother's Day to remember

Let me start off by thanking all of you for the wonderful outpouring of great messages, prayers and well-wishes. This will ramble, but I want to get the main points out there, and I want to try and do this while keeping my composure at work, I will do my best.

I finally got myself together to call at 4:00 yesterday afternoon. Sat down on our back porch, smiling as I was watching my family play in the back yard. I wanted OSDToy close by if I needed her, but not having to listen to every word. So I called and I got a very generic sounding answering machine. I left a message asking for her to call me. I was relieved that I was able to call, but disappointed that I did not get to talk. I tried an hour or so later, same machine. After we finished dinner (which was awesome), I went back out on the porch as I was going to try one more time before giving up for the day. I called and she answered. My heart skipped a beat, and then I said:

"I would like to please speak with OSDbirthmom."

"This is she."

"My name is OSD. Evidently, we shared a hospital room on March *, 19**. I wanted to call and tell you Happy Mother's Day and thank you."

After some silence, she said:

"Wow, just wow, Oh my God, thank you so much, I just do not know what to say, wow."

"Is this an ok time for me to be calling, is now a decent time for us to talk?"

"Yes, I just do not know what to say, wow."

"I just wanted you to know how thankful I am for what you did for me so many years ago, and I felt that Mother's Day would be an appropriate time forme to thank you."

She said "You're welcome, and I have always thought of you."

I need a few minutes to gather myself, but I wanted all of you to know that your thoughts and prayers were very powerful for me yesterday...more to come. Thanks for listening.
 
Sorry for the delay, just got a little overwhelmed, the article that Demonbeck posted was tremendous.

My birth mother was aware that the State of VA was opening the file, she just did not know that it had happened so quickly. The case worker had left her a voicemail on Friday and had given me the green light to call. It was not until I was actually talking to OSDbirthmom that I learned that she never got the message. She is living with her 80 year old mom who is not in good health, the answering machine was full and she never got the messages. She had know idea that I was going to call, let alone call on Mother's Day. That is why she was so shocked and surprised. After the initial shock wore off for both of us, we talked, and talked for an hour. There were never any lulls, and the conversation just flowed, we could have gone on for hours, but be were both mentally and emotionally drained. I learned that she was either 14 or 15 when she gave bith to me. She said that she was going to be 58 this year in June, so that would mean that she was 14 when I was born. I also have information indicating that she was 15, and I did not want to press the "math" issue as it was rather down the list of important info. I have two half-brothers, one who is 37 and one who is 30. The oldest has not had contact with her for 10-12 years, as he blames her for the divorce between her and his father. I did not pursue this last night. OSDbirthmom is not in good health. She was an in home and hospice nurse for more than 25 years, but her health has prevented her from working anymore. She has COPD and is on oxygen all of the time. She said that the medication that she is own has disrupted her vision, so she is unable to read like she used to. One of the reasons that we stopped talking last night was that she felt like she was going to start crying and that really messed with her breathing. I told her that I only wanted her to be ok and that we would talk againg soon. We discussed my childhood, her childhood, our likes, dislikes, educaton, family, sports, tv, the whole gambit. I had 2 "million dollar" questions. The first was "What can you tell me about my father?" After a long pause, she said that she was not prepared or in a place currenly where she could talk about it. I told her that I understood completely and that we could discuss whenever she felt comfortable. My second question was "Do you ever want to see me?" She said that she would very much like to do that. I suggested that we take all of the necessary baby-steps towards that direction. She said that baby steps would be good as she is not good at big steps right now. Her entire family knows that I exists, and here mother knows that we had exchanged letters. One of the things that she told me was that when she was younger, she had to convice herself that I was dead so that she could better accept the sepeartion. She apologized for telling me that, but I am glad that she did. She also told me that she knew in her heart that I was ok, that she had made the right decision, and that gave her some peace. I asked if I had upset her or caused discomfort by calling her, and she said absolutely not, that I brought a smile to her face, and that was a good thing b/c she didn't really smile anymore. That alone convinced me that I had done the right thing.
 
That is a very touching story OSD and I remained misty eyed through most of it. Thank you very much for sharing and I am so glad that it was such a positive experience for you.
 
OrigScreaminDemon said:
Sorry for the delay, just got a little overwhelmed, the article that Demonbeck posted was tremendous.

My birth mother was aware that the State of VA was opening the file, she just did not know that it had happened so quickly. The case worker had left her a voicemail on Friday and had given me the green light to call. It was not until I was actually talking to OSDbirthmom that I learned that she never got the message. She is living with her 80 year old mom who is not in good health, the answering machine was full and she never got the messages. She had know idea that I was going to call, let alone call on Mother's Day. That is why she was so shocked and surprised. After the initial shock wore off for both of us, we talked, and talked for an hour. There were never any lulls, and the conversation just flowed, we could have gone on for hours, but be were both mentally and emotionally drained. I learned that she was either 14 or 15 when she gave bith to me. She said that she was going to be 58 this year in June, so that would mean that she was 14 when I was born. I also have information indicating that she was 15, and I did not want to press the "math" issue as it was rather down the list of important info. I have two half-brothers, one who is 37 and one who is 30. The oldest has not had contact with her for 10-12 years, as he blames her for the divorce between her and his father. I did not pursue this last night. OSDbirthmom is not in good health. She was an in home and hospice nurse for more than 25 years, but her health has prevented her from working anymore. She has COPD and is on oxygen all of the time. She said that the medication that she is own has disrupted her vision, so she is unable to read like she used to. One of the reasons that we stopped talking last night was that she felt like she was going to start crying and that really messed with her breathing. I told her that I only wanted her to be ok and that we would talk againg soon. We discussed my childhood, her childhood, our likes, dislikes, educaton, family, sports, tv, the whole gambit. I had 2 "million dollar" questions. The first was "What can you tell me about my father?" After a long pause, she said that she was not prepared or in a place currenly where she could talk about it. I told her that I understood completely and that we could discuss whenever she felt comfortable. My second question was "Do you ever want to see me?" She said that she would very much like to do that. I suggested that we take all of the necessary baby-steps towards that direction. She said that baby steps would be good as she is not good at big steps right now. Her entire family knows that I exists, and here mother knows that we had exchanged letters. One of the things that she told me was that when she was younger, she had to convice herself that I was dead so that she could better accept the sepeartion. She apologized for telling me that, but I am glad that she did. She also told me that she knew in her heart that I was ok, that she had made the right decision, and that gave her some peace. I asked if I had upset her or caused discomfort by calling her, and she said absolutely not, that I brought a smile to her face, and that was a good thing b/c she didn't really smile anymore. That alone convinced me that I had done the right thing.
Click to expand...

wow, i made it through your original recap without tearing up. but you just got me here.
 
OrigScreaminDemon said:
"I just wanted you to know how thankful I am for what you did for me so many years ago, and I felt that Mother's Day would be an appropriate time forme to thank you."

She said "You're welcome, and I have always thought of you."
Click to expand...

What an amazingly caring and mature way to open. That must have been so good to hear after thinking about you for all these years. Thanks for sharing, great story!
 
OSD, thank you for sharing. Lots of tears at this desk too. Congrats on taking this step and asking some brave questions.
 
Thats really cool to hear OSD. I guess it kind of opens up a whole new world for you. I have a question, you may or may not answer if you feel, or anyone with adopted families. Now a days is medical history something you would say is a major secondary reason to find birth parents. For you OSD I doubt you got into it but is your birth mom a smoker and thats why she has COPD, or genetics that you can now test for AAT deficiency.
 
ThinkingWithMyDeac said:
Thats really cool to hear OSD. I guess it kind of opens up a whole new world for you. I have a question, you may or may not answer if you feel, or anyone with adopted families. Now a days is medical history something you would say is a major secondary reason to find birth parents. For you OSD I doubt you got into it but is your birth mom a smoker and thats why she has COPD, or genetics that you can now test for AAT deficiency.
Click to expand...

When I received medical info last year, I sent it to my Double Deac cousin who is a cardiothoracic surgeon here in NC. He indicated to me that unfortunately my birth mother is a "medical mess,' but that fortunately all of her issues were caused by smoking and that he saw nothing that jumped out as far as anything hereditary that should concern me.
 
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