Pit Secret Santa 2012 (gifts and such)

[SteelCityDeac]

STAY SAFE POVERTY GHOST

 

[ipitytheblue]

retiredtownie received from wolfdeac: some williams sonoma spherical ice cube makers (that are really nice and easy to use), a sick shot glass from Chichenitza (sp?) and some sweet Krispy Kreme coupons!

 

[HailToTheDeacons]

Thanks for running, ipity. Merry Christmas, all!

 

[bmoneydeac]

(still haven't gotten mine)

 

[Screamindemon3]

(still haven't gotten mine)

It's currently in Doraville, GA. Scheduled delivery on Monday morning by UPS. (I've been watching it closely :thumbsup

 

[bmoneydeac]

It's currently in Doraville, GA. Scheduled delivery on Monday morning by UPS. (I've been watching it closely :thumbsup

Lol got it today. Sweet Lakers indoor practice putting green.

 

[HailToTheDeacons]

Great gift

 

[JDawg]

There literally is nothing bad I could get for mine. Twisted German pr0n? Pretty sure they'd love it.

You get Manifest, Hello or Caturday?

lol

 

[JDawg]

Part 1 of the summary

November 28, 2012. Santa assignments go out. I receive mine and leisurely begin to think of what to get. I get distracted by dick pics, Pinterest, baby blogs, potentially having to do work.

November 29, 2012. People have begun to post about already buying gifts. Some gifts are on their way. I feel bad for my Santee because the speed of the other Santas is making me look like numbers. Oh well, there are lots more baby blogs to read.

November 30, 2012. 2:14pm. HTTD gchats me that he's gotten an email about 2 packages being in.

99% of me hopes it is my SS gift. 1% is a little sad that it might be my SS gift because I was excited to have something to look forward to for a few days. Mainly because my MIL already brought down a gift for me and it is almost as tall as I am and is staring at me in our living room just begging to be opened. Also, what if Nonny is my Santa and the gift sucks? (Spoiler alert: it doesn't suck. Must not have been from Nonny)

2:34pm. HTTD gets another email about a package!

**Side note. As I was writing this post I searched "mrs awar" to find the gchat and gmail did this:

**

He goes to pick our packages up because he is a good husband.

It is my gift! All sadness about not waiting longer is gone. Now I just want that gift. I immediately have a guess about who it is from based on the addressmanship.

5:00pm. I am out of work like a bat out of hell. I battle the roadways to get home. I get through the billion doors to our apartment and find this waiting for me:

First thought: DID SANTA GET ME A BABY?!?
Second thought: No holes in the box. A dead baby? =(

Then I remembered that HTTD told me the Kuerig came in. So the big box is that POS. (Speaking of - I'm selling this thing for $75 if anyone wants it.)

Up first I grab the padded envelope.

I have a quick, sinking feeling that maybe my Santa got me the most perfect gift in the world:

It is so perfect that I already own it, because HTTD knows how to woo a lady and gave it to me for Valentine's day. How will I break it to my Santa that I already own this piece of heaven? Maybe my Santee will like it and I can play it off as a coincidence that I sent the same gift?

Thankfully, it isn't that, but it is something JUST AS AWESOME.

A PENIS NAMING BOOK!!! THOSE EXIST??! My life has been bereft without. Everyone with a dingdog should beware that I will now be bestowing names. Craiglist will have a whole new meaning. A nod to both of my main interests - penises and babies - in one swoops sounds really disturbing and frankly probably illegal but this is perfect.

Now on to the next box.

I don't know what to expect. The first gift was funny but not in a creepy or "lol now what the hell do I do with this thing" way - will the second be the same? Will it be serious? What if it is a penis? I try to remember if Manifest is participating in Secret Santa this year. I sniff it. Doesn't smell like a penis. Shake it and something rattles. I consider googling to see if is it possible to mail a hard ween but think I better not based on my last few google searches. I open it and...in this box is a smaller box.

I open THAT box slowly and what to my wondering eyes should appear?? THIS GUY!

A phallic wine stopper!! Now while get my drank on I can plug up the hole with this little guy. And let's be honest, I drink a lot of wine. This guys is going to have his turkey baster in soo many bottle mouths. My little red gigolo.


Merry Christmas, indeed.





PS. I have named him Tomahawk.

Wow, that was the best reveal evAr! Well done AWAR! And nicely done on the gifts, df07!

I won't even attempt to do a blog reveal, so I will just thank HTTD for his lovely thoughtful gifts!

First we have the awesome Wake Forest snuggie (this will get plenty of use while reading books, watching The Walking Dead & Chopped, and even sitting at my desk in the corner working each day):

along with a Carolina Hurricanes ornament (Wolf1297 & I are asking Santa for a partial NHL season for Christmas):

Since gifts are arriving, I thought I'd go ahead and post this.

Hello, a paragon of nobility, asked for his gift to be a charitable donation. By his suggestion, $25 has been donated to the Wounded Warrior Project. I couldn't be happier to give this gift in his name. Here you go, buddy.

After, 2 failed delivery attempts, my gift arrived today (don't blame me, this shipping company is weird, like they called us Saturday and when we called them back 2 minutes later they were gone and said they couldn't come back). Well, whatever, it arrived today and by some delicious hickory smoked miracle...............the bacon was still cold! Yes I said bacon!! Apple Cinnamon Smoked Bacon. Like 2 pounds of it. But, my Secret Santa went overboard, and not only did he buy me bacon, he bought me bacon maple syrup, bacon pancake mix, bacon bits, bacon coffee, and pumpkin coffee. Also, thank you for not sending bacon lube. Mr. ITK said when we were unpacking it "What no lube?" but I think in his heart he would have been a little weirded out by a stranger buying us lube. Holy cow!

Thank you, DirtySouthDeacon!
:wiggle::wiggle::wiggle::wiggle::wiggle::wiggle::wiggle::wiggle::wiggle:

is this from Santa? It's adorable!

Awwwwww Hell yea.

Clever mix of two of my fave things, reading and drinking. Very well done Santa!

Thank you so much, Santa. I'd had my eye on Joy of for a while now.

In the twilight of the 80's, a boy was born. He'd become known as Townie.

Townie would go on to ride bicycles, grow beards, and write some short stories in that class we shared that one time.

Some of you know him as a music lover, some as a copy editor/manager (I think), some as that guy with the nipples that are unsettlingly far apart. Today, I know him as the man of my heart. (overboard? ok.)

I found this outside my apartment door today, astonished as much by the size as how little it weighed. (rimshot) I grabbed a beer and a pocket knife and took to disassembling.

It became apparent that this would be a messy job so I reassessed my approach.

First I noticed a handwritten note along with this, which excites me to no end. It's just so Townish. I had no idea WXPN was his hometown station but I spend a lot of time on NPR so this is especially awesome.

Finally, what appeared to be the pièce de résistance: a framed object. I carefully, carefully cut and unwrapped bubble and paper to find... a blank canvas stretched over a wooden frame. Which I turned OVER to find THIS:

Townie's "The Rise and Fall of the Atlantic" (possibly upside-down?)

I made a face for a while, a good face, the face of a man contemplating art. My walls are littered with photographs but this piece will stand alone. I cannot express my gratitude for the thoughtfulness and effort evident in this gift. Citizens of the boards, shower this man with rep or, better yet, buy him a beer sometime. I certainly will.

*I should note, however, the n00bishness of failing to sign/date your artwork. Come on man.


...


...


...

bathtub!

So I come into work today, and on my desk is a package. We get like 50 things a day delivered and this one doesn't say freeze immediately so don't think much of it and it sits there. So of course the observant plethora of Asians begin to question whats in this box that is so proudly displaying made in America.

I ask them if they are jealous it wasn't made in a slum factory of China, not quite understanding they just continue to annoy me. So I proceed to open the box and what do I find..... but little knitted sweaters to keep my most prized possessions cold. Luckily there are three of them as beers constantly need to be on hand during this long winter of the [Redacted] Zone.

So thank you very much Santa

 

[JDawg]

Moar summary

Thanks Cav!

If you were not aware, I have recently taken up the hobby of Homebrewing. It's a lot of fun and extremely rewarding - I'd recommend it to anyone who enjoys a good brew and/or likes to create something of their own. We have a thread about it here.

Clearly, my Santa has picked up on this because my gifts are homebrewing related! Currently, I am brewing an American Brown Ale called Caribou Slobber. It is in primary fermentation in this 6 gallon food-grade container.

That's 5 gallons of hardwork. Someday, it will be fermented enough to be bottled. When that day comes, I can make use of gift number 1:

Instead of being dull, brown-bottle mystery beers, each bottle will have this sweet label. Then, once the homebrew is in bottles, it will take a bit more time to condition and create the carbonation necessary to be drunk. But on drinking day, I will be able to serve this sweet nectar in these bad boys (gift number 2):

Thank you so much, Secret Santa. I found no identifying information with the gifts, so please out yourself for some positive reputation. Cheers!

Thanks Nonny! This inflatable beer cooler will be making an appearance at the next darty. Much appreciated sir!

First gift from TW! Came in a long slender box, only box Ive received that resembled it contained a tailgate flagpole. I open it and see the top of a yellow box, now i'm thrown off. As I turn the box over and let it slide out I am surprised by its weight. WOOHOO! Worlds largest gummy worm. He's a pic of it in the box on my kitchen tiles to help see how long it is Ill post more of the actual worm when I start eating it:

Next gift came the following day, I shook the box and felt soft contact against the interior walls, my guess was a T-Shirt, and what do you know, after cutting into the box, here is what I found:

Awesome gifts TW!

well that's just mean, jdawg.

Just got home for lunch and I had a package on my doorstep. I opened it up, and found this gem that I only assume was handmade and hand painted. The detail is uncanny. They almost seem like actual photographs.

Thank you for this family heirloom, that will be cherished for generations. I will display it where it belongs next to my Great Great Grandmother's 100 year old silver tea service.

Try ALL the recipes! Nice work.

Sent from my HTC Sensation 4G using Tapatalk 2

I received my gift from Santa over the weekend, but have been unable to post pictures until now. So here ya go:

I'll let y'all guess who my Santa was.

But seriously, thanks Santee!

Part two of my gift arrived today. Upon opening the package, I was greeted by the seven principles of Kwanzaa,

The identity of my Santa was finally revealed on the inside: bym051d!

What a boss he is, getting me such pertinent homebrewing gifts already. What else could he be delivering with this note? Through astute observation he had gleaned that I was taking a trip to Disney after the new year and got me this,

Finally, I got a gift that pairs well with one of awar's:

Thank you so much, bym!

My gifts are awesome, thanks so much Dash. The Panthers next excruciating loss will be a little more terrific with me naked and crying underneath a snuggie

 

[JDawg]

Part 3

MDMH...

I was able to get my gift today. Thanks so much. It turned out that it had the address for the wrong apartment on it, which is why I didn't get it when I asked.

I'll try and put pictures up later.

I got

Sushi making kit
Toy grenade
WF bumper sticker
Calvin and Hobbes book


and


MORAVIAN COOKIES.

Holy shit these are amazing. Thanks DeacdeTejas!

The massive worm in comparison to a credit card, just to show how wide it is.

View attachment 535

Deadeye dick cd! the band, not vonnegut novel. Looking forward to giving it a listen. Huzzah for regionally popular music!

View attachment 536

stoked! thanks TSY!
also, more awesome? she's one of the two fabulous women i'll be biking across Costa Rica with! HUZZAH!

Went by my apartment today and got this package. I knew it wasn't Drew because it was in an Amazon box. Thanks Secret Santa. Apparently there is something else on the way.

this morning at about 8:55 as i was rushing out the door, i looked to the left of my door and saw a rather good size package with the return address of simply "Santa" with a girly handwriting and knew iMMEDIATELY that i was going to love my present, as I had already began to deduct who this santa might be .

I rushed back into my apartment because I knew I wouldn't be able to wait until lunch time to come see the santa-riffic goods and ripped into the box to find a plethora of goodies:

first, I found a Starbucks gift card (in the Rodarte designer pattern. obvi this Santa knew exactly which one I would have picked out!). a peppermint mocha will be enjoyed later this week!

next, I unwrapped a smaller box and discovered a super cute black/gold drapey necklace. (took a picture but the flash wasn't on, so i'll have to come back and edit this one in later). anyway, looks just like me and will definitely be worn to a football game or two next fall.

in the third box, (and this is good because there is no way that this santa could have known this) I found a super cute red glittery shoe ornament. My christmas tree's theme is red/lime green glittery shoes/feathers. NO LIE. so this ornament literally is a perfect fit on my tree.

(please ignore the tag still on the ornament... this santee had to rush off to work right after opening and ain't nobody got time to cut tags off AND take pics in a 2 minute span)

in the last box, I had special instructions to "be careful" upon opening and got so so curious. I had given my santa instructions that I loved "polka dots, wfu, girly stuff and anything sparkly". this gift basically encompassed all of that into one awesome decorative item.

Thank you SO MUCH awakeandready!!! My entire apartment is black/white/blue/yellow so the picture is going to be perfect in a cute cluster in my living room. Fantastic santa-ing

Got home today and checked out our package room, and found a box addressed to "Nonny." Unfortunately it looked the box went on quite a journey. Hoping my Santa wasn't sending me anything too fragile.

Doesn't sound like anything is broke so I'm happy about that. Open it up and upon first seeing a Wake Forest logo, I grab it and find a Wake Forest cooler that can fit a 12-pack of beer. Quite awesome. Without a doubt this will be used to keep my beers cold on the golf course. Probably going to even be bringing it down to Jamaica for the links and beach. And I currently have it next to me as I drink some Tap Room #21 and Fat Tires.

Thanks, Santa. Please let me know who you are so I can pos rep!

Every xmas tree is made better with the presence of the Phanatic. Cheers!

 

[JDawg]

erg

 

[JDawg]

Erg again

Santa arrived! Awesome awesome awesome!

Custom bottle/can wraps.

Custom shot glass. Wooooooo. (Rum sold separately)

Thanks BDer!

Boom

Movie Madness

Santa did a good job

 

[JDawg]

Last part. That should be everyone. Hope I didn't miss any.

ladies and gentlemen!
...who am i kidding. there are no gentlemen here, and very few ladies.

hey everybody!

sorry to make you wait so long, except not really because i had a lovely night, good night's sleep, good 6mi run this morning, got a bunch of errands done, changed the oil, and made a shopping list for the grocery store. productivity of the last 14 hours aside, i present to you with much ado the last present of my 3-series from the closest thing to a gentleman these boards may ever know, TSY.

the Waterfall Lover's Guide to the Pacific Northwest! Or, if you open it and the packing slip is wrapped around the top of the book, you may first read it as 'Lover's Guide to the Pacific Northwest' and wonder what sort of book you're about to open.
For real though, pretty stoked about this one. There are lots of gems in this area, some better known than others, and I'm looking forward to exploring some new trails as we work through the falls included here.
Thanks, TSY!

I got home tonight, ripped up the package from Manifest Destiny and started pulling things out.

The first thing I pulled out, I exclaimed "WHOA, awesome!"

Yes that's a motherfucking Testudo spatula. It also has a bottle opener on the end as seen in the big picture. And then I pulled out a Santa ornament and another Santa bag with something in it....

Awesome work Manifest! Already texted the tailgating guys a picture of the spatula and they're jealous.

So, as you all know, I recently bought a house. Most of you also know that in the course of moving to my house, I became injured. On the evening of December 13 at 8:30, I decided to miss the last two steps at my apartment building. After a visit to the ER for x-rays and such, I learned I had a severely sprained left ankle with a hairline fracture of a bone in the ankle and a severely sprained right foot. I was given a special shoe for the right foot, a gel splint for the left ankle, and crutches (with two bad legs). The following morning of December 14 at 6:00 a.m. when I got up to get ready for the movers was probably the most painful two hours of my life as both my feet were swollen, the muscles were tightened, and I didn't have any pain meds in my system yet.

Despite the pain, the move went well and I'm enjoying living in my new home. I've made the first of many trips to Lowe's and bought myself new bedroom furniture including a california king bed. I'm still limping but the pain is really going away and should be back to normal in another week or so.

I tell you all this to set up my Secret Santa reveal. I still have the lease on the apartment until the end of this year so I've been going by to check the mail and check for packages (Secret Santa included). Yes, I kept going over to my apartment, going down 13 steps from the parking lot to the building and up 16 steps to my apartment on painful feet/ankles. On Sunday, December 16, I found the following in front of my door.

Christmas Eve was a great time as my folks were in town and I spent the day with my family and playing with my nieces. By this point, I was off crutches but still taking some pain meds. The swelling was down and I was able to wear normal shoes again (although loosely tied). That evening, I found this in the mailbox (It's a light blue dwarf's hat).

And today, I took the day off to do some light work around the house and to see my parents off as they left for home. There was some pretty bad slush/sleet/freezing rain in Roanoke today. I was finally able to hobble out to the mailbox around 2:00 when the stuff melted and found this (a dwarf banana plant).

So, after a wonderful Christmas with my family and the first Christmas in my house, I was still in need of some laughs so thank you to my Secret Santa (ThinkingWithMyDeac).

Lol got it today. Sweet Lakers indoor practice putting green.

 

[Screamindemon3]

Lol got it today. Sweet Lakers indoor practice putting green.

Sorry it took so long buddy

 

[bmoneydeac]

It's all good. Preciate it.

 

[AnonymousDeac]

So, funny story.

I bought that beer mug cooler from Urban Outfitters for WakeBDer. Well I hadn't shopped there until I decided I wanted this tank:

Well I bought it and forgot to change the previous address and now WakeBDer has a package from Urban Outfitters of this tank and another shirt. Fantastic.

 

[ITK]

D'oh!

 

[ipitytheblue]

heh, I've gotten burned on that before

 

[WakeBDer]

So, funny story.

I bought that beer mug cooler from Urban Outfitters for WakeBDer. Well I hadn't shopped there until I decided I wanted this tank:

Well I bought it and forgot to change the previous address and now WakeBDer has a package from Urban Outfitters of this tank and another shirt. Fantastic.

Oops. I'll send it back to you if you PM your address.